The Hokage's Exodus
by falling skywards
Summary: My take on Perfect Lionheart's 'Missing Hokage' challenge. Naruto fails to retrieve Sasuke so the council attempt to kick him out. Tsunade won't take this sitting down and leaves alongside him, with Hinata and Shizune. Check PL's profile for challenge.
1. Making Like Trees

The Hokage's Exodus

Chapter 1: We'll make like a tree.

Authors Notes: Here we go again. My take on Perfect Lionhearts challenge. Just thought I'd give it a shot, doubt I'll be as good as some of the others, but perhaps I can probably do alright. On with the show!

Oh yeah. It's fairly likely that there'll be bashing of epic proportions.

* * *

Kakashi stood before his student, if you could truly call him that, in the valley of the end. The blond before him lay there, shuddering and shivering in the cold, blood seeping from such a wound as Kakashi had not seen since the war or, perhaps, the Kyuubi attack.

A hole straight through his chest. Upon closer inspection he could see the boy's heart, shattered bones, and other organs, pulsating. It emitted a strange red aura that gave off the feel of Naruto's tenant, the grand demon lord: the Kyuubi.

Somehow Kakashi felt emotionless as he looked down upon his student, his survival not really mattering any longer.

He had failed Sasuke, his one hope and dream, his favourite. He had been his one chance at saving himself…redeeming himself through the last Uchiha. It was only through the wonder that was the Sharingan in Kakashi's eyes that he held any connection with the boy, and for that he thanked the spirits.

If Naruto died…then everyone he had ever loved would be dead. With a cold realization, he decided he didn't care. He didn't care about anything any longer, except saving Sasuke.

Picking his student up, he drew on Pakkun's chakra to allow him to make it back safely. As usual he drew without remorse leaving the canine with almost nothing, his usually stationary body now rolling in pain, howling.

Kakashi rolled his eyes, his mask hiding his look of disgust before leaping into the tree tops and heading back to his beloved Konoha.

* * *

Naruto awoke to pain and a feeling of being surrounded by water. Strangely enough, he was. Sitting up he shuddered, the slowly receding hole in his chest causing him to jerk violently, involuntarily.

The pain slowly receding, he sat up slowly and looked around. He sighed, knowing exactly where he was. In the sewer that made up his mind, the hallway before the room that housed his tenant.

Standing up, the pain a lot less now, he made his way to the beast's room. What he saw, he couldn't help but smile at.

The Kyuubi no Kitsune was curled up, in a ball, sleeping. Somehow this massive demon had done the impossible: made itself cute.

Snickering, he yelled "Oy, Kyuubi! Wake up you big fur ball!"

His only response was the opening of one eye that rolled at him, uncaring.

If there's one thing in the world that Naruto could not and would not deal with it was being ignored. He did anything he could for attention! Nothing could get in his way of being noticed. And when he did receive it, in a good, loving or caring way, he shone like a star. Proven by his learning of a Jounin level ninjutsu in hours.

Taking a kunai form his ever present pouch, he flung it towards his tenant. The result was a high pitched yelp, followed by a deep growl.

Naruto was absolutely stoked. He had a way to piss off the Kyuubi!

"**Ugh…Fucking bastard had to wake me up. What do you want?!**"

"Hey! You can't talk to me like that! I OWN you!"

"**I'll talk to you however I like. Sexist pig. I did just save your life, after all!**"

"Sexist pig…? We're both male. How can I be sexist about myself? What do you mean YOU saved my life? It was me that fought Sasuke! You were practically non-existent in that battle!"

The Kyuubi's eyes widened in rage, HER violent chakra exploding as nothing else could.

"**BOTH MALE?! BOTH MALE? YOU ASSUMING, IDIOTIC, UNCARING FOOL! I'M FEMALE!**"

Naruto was, to say the least, shitting himself in fear.

"**And weren't you paying attention? It was MY chakra that kept you going, gave you strength and let you keep up with the Uchiha, nothing else! It would make more sense if you WEREN'T paying attention for all the skill you showed! If we meet the toad sage again you are going to have to get more training!**"

All fear gone, Naruto was now feeling more than a little bit hurt. It was like he himself had just made fun of his own ninja skills. But he couldn't be that bad or Kakashi wouldn't have let him into the Chunin exams!

"What do you mean get more training?! I'm one of the best ninja out there! I took on Zabuza, Gaara and Kabuto! As well as heaps of others! They're all strong as enemies! And Kakashi-sensei let me into the Chunin exams! I must ROCK!"

The Kyuubi sighed. Being a deity that had lived for thousands of years, it was more than a little wise. It just tended to fall into its nature of expressing far too much rage. Now was the time to help out little Naruto, not get mad.

"**Naruto. As your tenant I have the right to tell you this, although undoubtedly you will not like what I have to say. Are you willing to listen?**"

Naruto, with an emphasised 'hmph' replied grudgingly in submission.

"**Good! Now listen closely. All your life you've been abused because of me. One of these reasons is your lack of chakra control, right?**"

"Yeah! My teachers at the academy always used to mock me and send me out of class all day because of it! Then when I asked how to fix it, they said you can't!"

"**Fucking bastards. But yeah, I know. Naruto it is actually possible to change that. Remember the tree climbing technique that your… 'teacher' showed you? That was one of the ways you can help it. Same with the water walking technique. There are most definitely others. Ask the toad sage. Another thing: your tiny jutsu repertoire. You know what…four jutsu? One of them, Kawamiri, is one of the freaking basics! You then have Kage Bunshin, Rasengan and Henge!**"

"Wait. Wait a minute. You said Henge wasn't a basic. What?!"

"**Hahaha. Naruto you have a very special Henge. The typical one is simply a genjutsu that doesn't actually affect the body. Yours, on the other hand, physically alters your body. It is, quite frankly, one of the most powerful ninjutsu to ever be created. And by a child, no less.**"

Naruto was surprised, as well as overjoyed. One of his many goals was to have heaps of cool, flashy jutsu. And now he had another! He was quite happy.

"**But still. Four jutsu is almost nothing. Like I said, ask the Sannin."**

"Alright. I'll ask Jiraiya once I wake up. Erm...I will wake up... right?"

"**Well duh. You think I'd waste time talking to about things as...trivial as this when your life needed saving? No way. You've got medics for that."**

"Oh. Good." replied Naruto, well relieved.

"**Now, something else I've noticed. The pink haired hag. Tell her to piss off and leave our body alone."**

"WHAT?! Why would I tell Sakura-chan that!?"

"**Well, for starters, she treats you like dirt. She practically asked you, the one person that has ever stuck by her, to go commit suicide in a most likely possible mission to save a bastard that has done nothing but ignore you. She hits you for the slightest comments using excessive force. She yells at you and tells you how useless you are. She fails to meet any part of the word 'team' at all, one of the few things your teacher got right."**

"B-but...she's so nice!"

"**Tell me Naruto, when has she ever _once_ been nice to you?**"

"Well...there...no...Erm...I don't know! I can't remember everything!"

**"Well thankfully, I can. To answer my own question: Never. Think about it."**

"Sure..."

**"Now. Back onto the subject of your skills. They need development, possibly even reconstruction. You also need a specialty. Not sure exactly how to get someone to teach you that… Ah look. Our time is up. When you wake up your reception may be harsh as to your missions failure, but you can deal with it. One last thing: Simply think in my direction and you'll be able to talk to me, most of the time I'll reply. In my time I've seen a lot so I'm a fountain of knowledge. See ya! **"

Naruto smiled in thanks, having someone being nice to him was a lovely change, before vanishing altogether from his mindscape.

* * *

A dazed Naruto blinked slowly, his eyes slowly coming to terms with the dull light in this room of the hospital that he was so accustomed to.

He almost smirked as he drew his nail along the side of his bedside table, marking the one hundredth visit to this intensive care unit of the hospital. He had almost missed this place having been five months since his last visit, an all time record since he was four.

He yawned, his suffering and pain being nothing new.

The door slowly opened and he was greeted by a very distraught Haruno, his minds very image of perfection.

She glared at him as she made his way to him before raising her now chakra imbued fist and smashing him in the chest. Repeatedly. Right in the spot Sasuke's Chidori had pierced.

"Naruto! You idiot! How could you let him get away?! You promised me! You're the worst ninja ever!"

"Ugh...Sakura-chan...I'm sorry!"

"NO! Sorry doesn't cut it! Now I'll never see him again! Why can't you ever be nice to me?!"

Naruto suddenly remembered the words of the Kyuubi and violently lashed out at her, smashing her into the wall.

"You…you bitch! What the fuck did I ever do to deserve such treatment?! I've only ever been nice to you, telling you how pretty you are and cheering you up when the gay bastard treated you, like everyone else as trash! Then, because you're a friend I promise to try save him, fighting through multiple Jounin level sound ninja to try save him then nearly DIE attempting to help him?! You're really just like everyone else in this city! Sakura Haruno: Get out of my life. You are no longer worth my time."

Sakura, completely bat shit insane, screamed before attempting to kill the 'annoying' blonde before her. She was, luckily for Naruto, stopped by Kakashi.

"Sakura. What happened here?"

Using all of her bitchiness to her advantage, as well as Kakashi's obvious dislike of Naruto she replied, tears in her voice "Ka-…Kakashi-sensei…Naruto he… he hit me! I just walked in here to ask him how he was and he smashed me into a wall!"

"Naruto! How could you?! You're trash! Nothing more than trash! I told you the very first day we became a team that those who do not care about their team are nothing more than trash. And now…I'm utterly disappointed in you. I would have thought that Sakura would deserve far better treatment than this."

Naruto sat in his bed, speechless, in shock. _The Kyuubi had been right…They all hated him. All of them. Well maybe not Tsunade or Shizune…Or Jiraiya…but still. Everyone else wanted his blood. If only he could leave. He no longer wanted to be Hokage of a village such as this._

"Leave me alone." Was his eventual response, its chilling, hatred filled sound resonating in each of their ears.

"Gladly!" Cried Sakura, Kakashi following her glumly.

* * *

"Naruto did WHAT?!"

"He brutally attacked me!"

Tsunade was shocked. She had not expected Naruto to ever lash out at the girl, regardless of how much she deserved to be beaten.

"But…Why?"

"I… I don't know!"

Her mother finally spoke up, the tears that had previously kept her silent now gone.

"That demon will pay for what he did to my girl! Such a sweet, caring thing is she, and he WILL pay. I have already spoken to the elders and we are all in agreement. After causing Sasuke to defect and now assaulting another member of his team, Naruto WILL be executed. Or, if he so chooses can renounce all titles associating him with being a Konoha ninja and leave the village forever."

Tsunade, who had been disbelieving before, was positively fuming now. How could those bastards constantly treat the boy so horribly?

With a sigh of submission, she asked that they leave her and Shizune be, at least until they could figure out what to do.

"Did you hear that? Those bigots… Ugh."

"Tsunade-sama. Although I don't mean to be offensive to the Haruno girl, I don't think she can exactly be trusted. I suggest you get a Yamanaka to check both participants memories."

"Aye…Sounds like a good idea."

Taking a swig of Sake straight from the bottle, she called for an ANBU with a button on her desk.

Immediately a member Shunshin'd in, wearing the cat mask.

"Oy, Yuugao. I need you to go get me… Ino Yamanaka. She's probably the only Yamanaka that doesn't mind Naruto, so I need her to check his memories over the last day. Then do a repeat check on Sakura. Once you've got your info let me know."

"Sure, Tsunade-sama. But first may I ask: why?"

"Although it isn't actually your business, I'll tell ya. I like you, you see. Sakura Haruno has claimed that Naruto Uzumaki assaulted her, violently. Now from her almost complete lack of bruising and her reputation for hating Naruto, I doubt it. But no matter what happens the council has issued that he be killed. They've even gone so far as to have it signed by one of the daimyo's emissaries."

"Ugh…bastards. Alright I'll have your info within an hour."

She bowed as she left; her utter respect for her Hokage apparent.

"Now Shizune. What are we to do?"

"Ano…What do you mean? We can't over-power the Daimyo, regardless of what we want to do. No ninja will save his life…We're stuck."

Leaning against her desk while gazing across her city, she pouted.

"He's not going to let them execute him. He'll leave. And if that's the case…why are we here?"

"I'm not sure what you mean, Tsunade-sama."

"I mean what reason to we have to be in this fucking hell-hole? It is only because of Naruto that we're here. Since we've been here we've seen nothing but his abuse and made nothing but a whole bunch of political enemies. And to top it all off now we're gonna be known as the duo that LOST Konoha's favourite little snob, Sasuke."

Shizune, finally understanding, frowned. Her teacher, and best friend, was right.

"Cheh. Fuck this Shizune. Let's get out of here. You me and Naruto, back on the road, like old times. We can train him to be a medic, rather than that bitch Sakura, as well as show him a thing or two about the world."

"Y'know. You're actually right. I was wrong in letting you come here. Its not worth us staying any longer. Lets give them as much hell as possible too!"

"You've got my attention. What do you suggest?"

"Stop us from becoming missing-nin! Simply release us from the ninja force. But being able to return to it at a later date would be nice. And take some others that are willing with us. Someone important if we can."

"Heh. All good ideas, but I think we can cause a bit more havoc. All that later though. Until then: lets go get our 'someone important'!"

Shizune smiled at the wild gleam in Tsunade's eye, the first time she had seen without her being drunk.

* * *

A young Hinata Hyuuga was interrupted from arranging her flowers when suddenly there came a knock on the door. Blushing madly, she made her way over to find none other than the Hokage and her assistant before her.

"Hey."

With that simple, disrespectful greeting the two made their way into her room, Shizune being dragged unwillingly due to their lack of welcome.

Hinata was shocked by it, curtesy being the staple food of her household.

"Are we in private?" Receiving a curt nod, she continued "Good. Look, you like Naruto right? Like you're mad about him. And you know how much the village hates him? Well on his recent mission he failed to retrieve Sasuke, much to his own dismay. Currently there are claims that following this he violently assaulted his own team mate: Haruno Sakura. The council have overreacted to this, and now are planning to execute him, or banish him."

"Those…those…FUCKING BASTARDS!!" Hinata suddenly left her typical character, her protective feelings for Naruto sending all typical character actions out the window.

"What are we gonna do? We have to convince them to stop! You can't let this happen! You're the Hokage!"

"Hinata, I'm sorry. As much as I wish I could cancel this, I can not. The daimyo has stamped approval on it. But we are going to take their supposedly 'brilliant' idea of banishing him, and use it to undermine them. We're going to leave alongside him, taking the Hokage hat with him. We aren't going to even become missing-nin for this! We're going to take, alongside with the Hokage hat, money and special items that we can use as ninja. We'll take the two of you on as apprentices as well, teaching you medical jutsu. Keen? You'll have Naruto all to yourself!"

Her mind stopped even thinking about the question with the final comment.

"Can we leave now?"

Tsunade, with a laugh, replied "Sorry. We don't even have Naruto signed onto this yet, let alone prepare laws to take place so that we don't get in trouble. But at the most we will be leaving tomorrow night. Probably gonna destroy something beforehand, just for the hell of it."

Hinata grinned evilly and nodded her agreement one final time.

* * *

Naruto was pissed. He had so far only had four visitors, one was Ino and she was only there under Hokage orders. She had barely said a word upon entering, although her hug and thanks for at least trying to save Sasuke was nice. Much nicer than Sakura, that's for sure.

Apart from her there had been Shikamaru and Kiba, even if briefly and Jiraiya.

He had had a long chat about how pissed off he was with him who seemed to understand perfectly. He had even promised him more training after talking about his meeting with the Kyuubi, as well as extensive chakra control practice.

That had been the brightest point of his day thus far.

His chest had finally healed up and he was at the receptionist being signed out when he found himself tackled to the ground.

A small, lavender eyed girl had wrapped herself around him, seeming like she actually cared. It made Naruto feel fantastic. Shortly behind her was Tsunade and Shizune, both with fake smiles; he could tell they were grim and apprehensive about something.

"Oy, granny Tsunade. What is the matter?"

"Naruto. Come with me. We must talk."

Naruto, usually one to ask questions, could sense just how serious she currently was, which made him uneasy, although he followed her into 'his' room without question.

* * *

"And you're serious about the whole 'execution' thing?"

"Dead serious, Naruto. Those bastards want you cut into fours, your body eaten, your head stuck on a pole at the city gate and the pole set on fire. To say the least." Was his response from Tsunade who had just finished her arduous explanation for the second time in the day, with the added info from Ino.

Turns out SAKURA had hit Naruto, not the other way around. Sakura also had something…wrong with her and was going to be checked out more thoroughly by the experienced members of her clan.

Naruto, who had recently begun looking inward to focus on things around him finally nodded. "Alright. I'm in. Then again, how could I not be? Its either this or die, horribly, as you described before."

Tsunade smiled, although already expecting this answer, it was still nice to hear. The blonde Hokage then stood up, appendages wobbling.

"Come on Naruto. Lets go. You need to get some things ready, such as ninja tools and anything else you want to bring with you. The other two are already gearing up. Meet me in my house at nightfall, around nine o'clock, my office. We could well be leaving tonight, if we get everything finished."

"Alright. See you then."

* * *

Naruto now stood before his old, shoddy, empty apartment building, the metallic fencing around it doing nothing beneficial for its sterile image. The cracked walls, fading paint and never-ending cold that seemed to emit in this area brought back cruel memories. Thoughts of being assaulted, stolen from, insulted and tormented filled his defiled mind.

He would not miss this hell hole, not one bit.

He shoved chakra into his legs, ignoring the stairs. As he made his way up he realized he had miss-judged the distance significantly and was now going to miss, possibly impaling himself on the sharp barbed wire he had recently erected, or perhaps one of the many traps around the place. Through sheer instinct he shot chakra out of his back, propelling him forwards.

Hurtling forwards it looked as though he would not make it. Through sheer luck he landed on the railing, although he was angled at ninety degrees off the rail, hanging as though a lantern for a festival. Shoving chakra to his feet he forced himself to remain in contact with the metal railing. Using the same technique he had just used he emitted a blast of chakra out of his back, bringing him back to a vertical position. _Nifty. A new technique! _He thought to himself.

With his feet now set directly upon the railing alongside the path that lead to his door, he slowly began to feel more and more confident with his movement as he walked up and down the length of it.

It was similar to the tree-climbing and water-walking exercise, although slightly more difficult due to the different substance, as well as the area he was able to emit from.

"_Oy, Kyuubi! Is this what I think it is?"_

"_**Aye, Naruto. It's helping your chakra control, quite extensively in fact. 'Konoha's most unpredictable ninja' comes through again, neh?"**_

"_Heh. I suppose so. Cheers, I'll share this with the girls."_

Suddenly feeling a lot closer to his inhabitant, he smiled before making his way inside. The Kyuubi had been nice to him of late, the least he could do was to return the favour.

As he went around collecting his things he contacted the Kyuubi again:

"_Hey Kyuubi. I was just wondering. Seeing as you're stuck inside me, quite possibly for a long time, is there anything I can do to make your life a bit easier?_"

"_**Wow. I'm surprised you asked. But actually, there is. You've noticed how fucking damp it is in here, right? Well if you go ask a Yamanaka or genjutsu user to help out, they can teach you how to mess around with things. Such as opening all the doors in this place. It's one of the reasons you're a lot worse of a ninja than you could be, you have almost no access to your memories. That's both of our faults. Your subconscious mind trying to protect yourself, and me trying to stop you from suffering. I had no idea that the combined efforts would result in this. Sorry.**_"

"_You mean…I can get a lot better with, almost, no work? I'll go get Ino once I'm done!_" Naruto replied happily.

* * *

As the door shut behind him, Naruto looked around the room that made up Ino's flower shop; smiling. This had always been a nice place in his opinion, the colors and smells of the room setting off a strange peace in his mind. Gazing up and down the rows, colors bouncing at his mind forming a fractal, he noticed his target: Ino.

Making his way over to her, he realized he had no idea what to say. When he thought about it he realized he had never held a proper conversation with a girl his age before. They always told him to shut up, with the exception of Hinata who just fainted. Strange girl, that one.

Frantically considering how to begin a conversation, everything sounding too idiotic for a girl like this, he was shocked to hear: "Oh. Hey, Naruto. What do you want?"

Hearing such a simple, clean question made him smile. Not many people spoke to him as though he was human.

"Heh, hey Ino. You know how you were looking around my head earlier? Well I was wondering if you noticed anything weird in there."

Ino almost laughed. His head was seriously messed up, a level of mentality equalling that of someone suicidal.

"Yeah Naruto. It was…horrible. The flooding of the sewers, the lack of light and all those locked doors…You've clearly got some things in there that I DO NOT want to see."

Naruto's heart almost sunk, although he had been expecting such an answer.

"Ah. Well I was wondering if you could help me out? I seem to only be able to enter the place when I'm in pain. And when I-" "Hang on. You can enter that…hellish place? By yourself? But…that's impossible! There's no way you can do it alone!"

"Seriously? I've been in there multiple times. Never knew it was a big deal."

"What?! We learnt all about mindscapes in the academy! We did a study on them for three days. All ninja should know about them!"

He rubbed his head sheepishly before answering "Heh. I guess that's one of the lessons I missed."

Turning her head sideways, she squinted at him. Suddenly he felt an impossibly sweet sensation, before having it ripped away. "You're lying. That day you got sent out of the class by our teacher for…asking a question? What?! They wouldn't let you back in…that is really weird!"

"Well…to be honest…now that I think about it…the teachers did send me out a lot. At least they didn't beat me!"

"Erm…why would they have beaten you? That's silly to even bring up!"

"Well you see I get beaten a lot. By adults, or ninja. Occasionally it is really serious. Like LIFE THREATENING serious. Actually, most of the time it's like that. Ah well, I guess I have simply gotten used to it."

"That's…horrible! How could someone ever hit you! You're such a nice guy! A bit annoying, sure, but you always mean well!"

Naruto shrugged in response, the sheepish rub returning.

"Anyway…I was wondering if you could help me out with some of the things in my head?"

"Sure Naruto. Although I'm a bit busy at the moment, I can meet you at your place around…nine-o'clock?"

"Hrm. Sorry, at nine I've got a meeting with the Hokage. And after that…well…it's confidential. But if you can come to her office around then, it should be all good."

"Confidential, aye? Bet you and her are gonna have a really 'special' time with her. I mean you have been spending a lot of time with her. Jiraiya would be proud." She said while poking her tongue out.

Naruto simply rolled his eyes, smiled and left with a thanks.

* * *

Naruto entered the room that was the Hokage's office, looking around this familiar room. The insignia on the wall, the desk, the chairs, everything he saw in a strangely new light. During his time on his hospital bed, and while he had gathered his belongings, he had been thinking; unusual for this demon-cursed child.

He was seeing the entire world in a different light, noticing them with more clarity as well as noticing the people more along the lines of how they truly acted. Sine if it…made him sad.

"Ah. Naruto. Welcome to the show. Everything sorted?"

"Nearly everything, Tsunade-baachan. I asked Ino if she'd come up here and help me with my mind. According to…" Glancing around the room he spotted Hinata, unbeknownst towards his 'lovely' tenant and happily gazing about the room, simply happy to be in the same room as her 'Naruto-kun' again, as well as being able to spend a prolonged amount of time with him.

"_**I heard that kit…**_"

Smiling, he continued "According to someone my mind has some strange things inside, so she's going to come around and give me tips on how to fix it."

"Ah. Are you sure that it's wise that she be poking around your head? Certain 'things' in there may scare her."

"Don't worry. I'll make sure certain 'foxy things' don't bother her."

"Alright, excellent. Now we are currently reviewing our plan, and we're pretty happy. I have just sent Shizune off to collect a large amount from the treasury, one hundred million ryo, to be exact. On top of that I am going to go collect a few scrolls, such as the forbidden scroll and a few summoning scrolls."

"Why do you need them? I've already got the frog scroll, and you've already got the slug contract. Why would we need any others?"

"God Naruto, you're a real idiot sometimes, ya'know?"

"Hey it's not my fault no one ever taught me anything!"

"It's simple logic you dipshit!"

"Old hag!"

"Annoying blonde!"

Hinata, perturbed by the scene before, managed to speak up. She knew that if she ever wanted Naruto's attention she was going to have to work for it, and this was one of the many ways she could accomplish it.

"Eh…Hokage-sama…If you'll a-allow me to speak? The reason it's so good to have multiple scrolls N-Naruto-kun is so that…so that you c-can use them in different ways. For instance…If you have the f-frog summoning scroll you can't exactly have them help you climb trees like the m-monkeys, can they?"

"Well I suppose that's true. But if that's so then why doesn't everyone in the village borrow from one another? Like having everyone sign Kakashi's dog contract, as well as the monkey one?"

"Naruto. It just isn't done like that. They're prized possessions, some of the most powerful ninja techniques around. They also cost a whole bunch of chakra to use. They're kept heavily looked after, although I can take them from anyone…I…like…" The Hokage paused mid-sentence. She had always known she was allowed to take them, being her ninja village and all. She had just never taken up the offer. And with Naruto's mention of the dog contract, a powerful ally to have, as well as a few other more hidden scrolls, such as the turtles.

"Hinata. Come. You and I are going to collect a few summoning scrolls from around the town. Then we'll collect the rest of our equipment. Naruto, you wait here for your little girlfriend."

"She's not my-Oh whatever…"

Glancing around the room Naruto found Hinata's pale white eyes widened in disbelief. In contrast to the moon, it made her look quite beautiful, something Naruto had never noticed about her before.

Quite the contrary, Hinata was thinking about a completely different blond and raging at her, hard. Ino had gone behind her back, even though everyone knew SHE had dibs on Naruto? She would have all of hell to pay when she saw her. If she had asked to share, it would have been fine. But nooo, she had to go and be selfish. Bitch.

Tsunade, looking at the two kids knowingly simply laughed and signaled Hinata to follow her, to which she complied.

* * *

Tsunade made her way towards Kakashi's apartment, a small building on the edge of town in an empty building. She had sent her little 'apprentice to be' off to find Gai and sign the turtle scroll. She had a Hokage stamp, so it should be no trouble. Kakashi, on the other hand, would most likely constantly pretend to ignore her. If he did that, she'd smash him into a wall. Joy.

Shunshin-ing into his apartment building she whipped out her skeleton key, capable of unlocking any door in the city and entered.

She was not at all surprised to find porno posters all over the wall while Kakashi lay, inebriated, watching porn on the couch.

"Oh! Heeey Tssunade! How's it-" he hiccupped "going?"

"Ugh I can't believe I let myself get into such a state. And seeing it coming from you is all the more disgusting. Regardless, I need to sign the dog summoning contract. It's important, for the safety of the village and what not."

"Suuure baby, but what's in it for me? Can I feel up those big old jugs of yours?"

Tsunade sighed, rolling her eyes. "Sure Kakashi. Grope away, AFTER I sign." She replied, planning on smashing him into a wall the moment he made his way towards her and her well protected chest.

Performing the seals he summoned a small dog, covered in red fur. Strapped to its back was a scroll, on its face: fear.

"H-here you go Kakashi..."

Kakashi formed 'U's' with his eyes, indicating his happiness. The dog literally emitted a 'phew' before disappearing back to wherever it came from, probably some canine coven elsewhere. Kakashi passed her the scroll which she signed deftly after biting her thumb, blood being the necessary sacrifice. She immediately felt a connection to the dogs, as she did to the slugs.

Glancing up she saw a lecherous grin on Kakashi's surprisingly handsome face, revealed only now as he was horribly drunken, uncaring whether or not his face be seen.

Breaking her promise she flooded chakra into her soon to be rebellious arms, smashing him directly in the jaw and hurtling him into a wall. After receiving Ino's report on Naruto's mind earlier and discovering how badly Kakashi had treated her closest male friend, she found this ever so satisfying.

Making her way out, her task complete, she shattered his door into a thousand pieces, smiling all the while.

* * *

Hinata's mission, on the other hand, had gone quite smoothly, meeting with a calmer, yet somehow stranger Gai, something that had managed to disturb her, without even knowing how.

All the same, she had completed her mission and was heading back when she bumped into Kiba.

The dog boy had come running around the corner near his compound, coincidentally close by to Gai's house, tears streaming down his face.

"K-Kiba-kun? What's the matter?"

"It's...Akamaru...He got owned by those fuckin' sound bastards...he might not make it...and I just don't know what to do! He's like my best friend in the whole world..."

"Oh Kiba...I'm so sorry...but I sort of have to go meet with the H-hokage now...sorry I can not be there for y-you..."

Kiba's face suddenly contorted, a sudden feeling of rejection mixing and mingling with his previous fear and distress, a cocktail of pain.

"B-but Hinata-chan...I...I need you now!"

Hinata felt elated and complimented both, and yet she shook her head in refusal and ran off, leaving Kiba feeling completely dejected. He assumed she was going off for her 'Nawuto-kun' or some shit. He spat in her direction.

* * *

Naruto had been waiting a good twenty minutes before Ino showed up. He had been sitting grumpily that entire time. Regardless of his slow steps into maturity lately, he was still practically a child in every since, prone to getting angry with things he didn't like. One of those things was inactivity, something he had suffered from for far too long.

As Ino walked through the door, quite late, he shot up, prepared to berate her.

She immediately shot an ocular dagger at him to which he replied to by sitting down. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but even a woman scorned had nothing on a Kunoichi in a bad mood. Naruto realized it was probably not a good idea to ask why.

"So, Naruto. I've got a few books here on how to enter one's mind and what to do within..." she sighed, clearly not her favourite place to be. "And seeing as you can occasionally enter on your own it probably applies once you're in there. Can I go now? I've got better things to do than hang out with y-"

Suddenly the door crashed open, a cackling Shizune entering. Her eyes gleamed evilly while her small hands were filled with larger bags of money than she should have been able to carry. Being a typical goody-good, something this mischevious brought out a different side in herm something not commonly seen by anyone but Tsunade. And that only happened when she somehow managed to get her drunk.

"Eh?! Shizune-chan? What are you doing? Is it even YOU there?"

"HAHAHA yes Naruto, it is I. I have our one hundred million Ryo. I take it the girls will be back from signing the scrolls soon. Following that Tsunade will sign our and her papers, issue a few decrees, and we'll be rid of this hell-hole for a looong time."

Ino, thoroughly shocked by this little speech from the Hokage's assistant, piped up. "Be _rid_ of this _hell-hole_? Are you guys...leaving? No way. The Hokage can't leave! Neither can you Naruto! What's going on?!"

Shizune looked at the younger blonde and begin to think within her own mind. "_Do we tell her...or not... she could be a useful ally if she chooses to come with us...but if she doesn't then she could rat on us...or she could simply pine after us for a while... fuck it. I am gonna tell her._"

"Okay, look, Ino. It's like this. Naruto came after me and Tsunade to convince us to be Hokage. Without him, it wouldn't have happened. We love the little guy." Naruto blushed at the compliment. "But, as you probably know, your village does not. He's practically their whipping boy."

"That's a bit of an exaggeration. I mean sure, people don't exact think Naruto is the greatest, but that's because he's always pulling pranks!"

"Tell me, does that constitute calling him a, and I quote from at least ninety-five percent of Konoha's population: 'a demon'. No? I thought not. You know the result of his recent mission to receive Sasuke, correct? He failed. The council has claimed him now as forcing the boy to go, and, as you know, someone who assaults his own team members. They have now got the Daimyo's permission to have exiled or killed and they desperately want the latter. Seeing as they want to hurt the only reason me and Tsunade are here, we're going to fuck. Them. Up." She smiled, flashing somehow sharp teeth. "We're leaving, taking treasures and scrolls with us, as well as a lot of money. Oh, and Hinata! Should be fun!"

Ino was speechless. Her village could treat someone like that? Someone that acted so nice all the time? It was...idiotic. She would be thinking about this little tid-bit of information for a long time, definitely discussing it with her parents.

"I...I have to leave...I...I need to think about what you've said...I...Are you serious?"

"Completely and utterly" replied Tsunade, of who had just entered her own, large office, closely followed by Hinata.

"We've got the two scrolls sorted, dog and turtle. Now all we've got to do is issue some laws, collect some jutsu scrolls and blow this joint."

Ino nodded, shocked into a silent stupor, and left, almost crying. Everything she had placed her trust in was now nothing more than…evil. Pure evil, treating Naruto so cruelly. Thinking back, she remembered how during the academy Naruto had been so nice to everyone, chatting to them when no one else would, giving them all compliments, making jokes to cheer them up and so much more. But all anyone had ever done was treat him like dirt, seeing as it was the normal thing to do. How…utterly depressing. Especially seeing how she had partaken in the tyrannical way they had berated him. Leaving, she shed a tear.

The Hokage looked at her fellow blonde female and smiled, another one, perhaps, to join their ranks at a later date.

"Now, let's finish the job. I'll write out a few laws. You guys watch out for anyone that might barge in on us."

She walked to her hard wooden desk; one passed down since her grandfather, pulled out a scroll and began to write.

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare Naruto Uzumaki and Hinata Hyuuga as chunin of Konoha.**_

Smiling at her first decree, she continued.

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare that I take Hinata Hyuuga as my second apprentice.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare that I take Naruto Uzumaki as my third apprentice.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare that Shizune, Hinata Hyuuga, Naruto Uzumaki and I, Tsunade Senju, all be released from the ninja service of Konoha and that all previous obligations are removed.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare that Jiraiya the toad sannin hereby joins the ranks of Konoha's ninja and is promoted to jounin.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare Jiraiya to be my successor as the sixth hokage of Konoha.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare the entire Hokage's collection of scrolls to become my property.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare Sasuke Uchiha is now seen as a missing-nin and is set to KOS status.**_

_**As the fifth hokage, I, Tsunade Senju, hereby declare that no ninja may follow me without my direct permission. Any that do are to be immediately executed.**_

Now done with her task she covered it with countless seals and traps set to go off if anyone attempted to destroy the scrolls.

Walking to the 'paperwork' section of the desk, she reached in and pulled out some mission scrolls she had prepared earlier: six C-ranks, four B-ranks, three A-ranks and one S-rank.

Happy with her now complete handiwork, she stamped the lot and made her way to the door, her small team following.

* * *

The team raced towards her mansion knowing that if they didn't make it out of town before midnight then ANBU would see them leave and the time before the elders realized what had happened and sent teams after them.

Reaching the mansion that was Tsunade's house; they entered and made their way to a small library filled with countless pieces of fiction and history pieces from around the world.

Their leader, Tsunade, then made her way to the far wall. Pulling a small, green book from it, the wall itself began to recede into the ceiling, pulled by some unseen force. Each member of the team marvelled at what was in front of them. Before them were rows and rows of scrolls on shelves, ranging through each of the five elements, clan specific jutsu, ninja style scrolls, medical textbooks too and finally, the majestic 'forbidden section'.

As the girls began to seal onto bags, containment seals, and fill them with scrolls, Naruto's eyes were drawn into the clan section as though some unknown power was calling him. Walking alongside columns he could spot names of clans such as the Aburame, Akimichi, Haruno, Inazuka and so on. As he came to the end of the section there were four especially large scrolls on platforms, as though they were 'the best'.

As he looked them over the one on the far right caught his eye. 'Namikaze', was written on it, and he felt as though it belonged to him. Looking up he noticed a red sign and some kanji. Seeing as he could not read kanji, he reached out to grab the Namikaze scroll, eyes wide and excited.

From back at the end of the row, Hinata, who had been sent to retrieve all clan scrolls, had just spotted her love reaching towards the Namikaze scroll. Glancing up, she quickly read the warning sign: '_Do not attempt to open one of these four special scrolls if it does not fit your own bloodline. They have been set to fill any non-clan members with both poison and a violent chakra. It will cause immediate and irreversible death_'.

Hinata looked back down as Naruto bit his thumb and ran the blood over the scroll, senses screaming at her to stop him.

"Naruto-kun! No! Stop! You'll die!"

Naruto, who had just finished opening the scroll paused and looked up.

"Hinata? What are you on about?"

Hinata, seeing that her foxy blonde was fine immediately came to the conclusion that Naruto was a Namikaze, and, feeling quite sheepish, replied "Ano…nothing…don't worry."

Naruto shrugged and began to look over the scroll. He discovered the language within was quite complex and as such he would have to read it at a later date, hiding it in his pocket. He felt as though only he should be allowed to learn from it, seeing as it 'belonged to him'.

Shizune ran around to see what the commotion was about, finding a distraught Hinata and a confused Naruto. The two were simply standing there so she yelled at them to work, which they immediately obliged, placing scrolls in countless bags.

Once completed, they all followed Tsunade outside, everything set.

"Okay guys, the time is 11:04 pm. That means we still have 55 minutes, tops, before we have to get out of here. We have two options: leave now giving us an extra 56 minutes at the least on the bastards in this city, or, the far more fun option: wreck the city. I vote the latter."

"Seconded" Naruto piped up, to which the other two girls in the party nodded.

"So what exactly should we do?" was Shizune's question.

Naruto, being the prankster of Konoha smiled. Now that he had some willing aids in his pranks he could pull off a lot of things he was previously incapable of.

"Alright guys, just listen up."

The three adoring-of-Naruto females moved in closer to hear the blonde boys plan, smiling brighter and brighter as he spoke. A good plan.

* * *

As the party made their way out of the city at 11:48 according to Tsunade they all chorused in laughter. It had been fun pulling off the prank, and Naruto now felt, for one of the first times in his life, accepted by his peers and colleagues as ninja. It was a great feeling.

"Alright guys, we better get going. But where to?"

The group pondered this a while before Naruto had an idea. "How about wave village? Me and team seven did a mission there and we saved it from this…mad-man. They even named their bridge after me! It was sweet as. We'd definitely be more welcome there than anywhere else, at least for now." Naruto smiled, remembering his old friends.

"Let's go!" Naruto assumed agreement and sprinted off, smiling, with his three closest friends in tow leaving Konoha behind for good.

* * *

Authors conclusion: Well there you have it, chapter one of The Hokage's Exodus. I thought the name was the next best thing to 'The Missing Hokage', and, seeing as both Jonque and RaiderXV had the same title, I thought I should keep well away from it. I suggest you check both of those authors out, a comparison would be good, even if I came out as worse. Both are in my favourite author's section.

Next chapter posted within two weeks.

Note that I am looking for a beta, so anyone interested I'd love to hear from you.

_**Tuesday, 9th December: Multiple changes made to this chapter, both to do with characters and grammar. Hopefully improved.**_

_**Thanks to wingsofeagle for the save.  
**_


	2. Puppies and Problems

Ve Authors notes: Woah. I was shocked at the reception chapter one received; within two hours I had over 300 hits. Thank you guys so much for your reception, it really means a lot. Any questions had by a reader, feel free to ask. Thanks to those who pointed out my errors in the last chapter, they were immediately fixed. Thanks also to Robert Gao, the man who constantly reads over my works and helps out with both ideas and grammar. Love you man. Finally, thanks to both RaiderXV and wingsofeagle who helped me out to no end in the last chapter.

You had questions and comments, here are your answers:

On Hinata's screaming, something brought up multiple times in reviews: You guys wouldn't cuss if one of the few people you cared about was about to be executed over something that was easily proven as not his fault? Huh. That's strange.

Jiraiya's instatement into the Konoha ninja ranks: In my opinion, he's no longer a Konoha ninja. He doesn't wear a headband, nor does he bear any sign other than his face as recognition or tribute to the bastard filled village. Also, in the databooks, he is stated as having the occupation of a writer, previous occupation as a jounin sensei. Through inference it tells you he is no longer a Konoha-nin. Sure, it's debatable, but for now it stays.

For any of the early readers, please re-read as there has been multiple changes made to Kakashi and grammar/spelling.

Let's rock and roll.

* * *

The group practically flew through a lush jungle; trees, ferns and bushes all around them. The smell of the forest crisped in Naruto's mind, fresh, like newly opened ramen. He smiled as he emitted chakra to his feet, running alongside his three closest female friends, Tsunade, Shizune and Hinata.

From branch to branch they hopped, giant grasshoppers on giant leaves, minds intent on making their way to their destination before the next nightfall.

They had jumped all night long, setting a huge distance between them and their old hometowns, racing with such speed one could almost believe the entire horde of Hades was hot on their trails, hunting and destroying as they followed this 'Team Hokage'. Through wood and dale the powerful team ran, tiring, and with panting breath sunk into a lifeless clearing. The blond, however, continued to hop; his stamina surpassing belief.

"Oy, Naruto! Stop your-" she paused for a breath "bloody running."

"Yeah N-Naruto...it's...too much."

Receiving a nod from the boy in question, she fell straight over, lying flat against the emerald grass.

"Heh...You guys really need to get in shape. I'm not even half out of chakra!"

The rest of the party there, excluding Hinata, laughed. From within the blonds head he could hear his demon tenant taking part, as though it were some kind of inside joke that he was not aware of.

"Naruto-kun. That's because you have the-" she paused and looked at Hinata.

Tsunade frowned, deep lines appearing on her 'fake' face. Hinata's ignorance would no doubt be a problem that would ceaselessly affect their ability to discuss things with one another. Eventually the young girl would feel as though she were excluded from the group once she noticed how often they had to stop while talking about Naruto, possibly resulting in her leaving the group altogether. Although with Naruto aboard that event was fairly unlikely, it was not something that Tsunade wanted to risk lightly.

"Eh Naruto, I guess this as good a time as any. Might as well tell her. Just don't be your usual idiotic self about it. Come on Shizune" she said with a sigh "might as well give them some privacy." As she walked off she winked at Hinata, giving her the impression that something 'wonderful' might happen.

"Aye, Tsunade. Good luck Naruto."

With that the elder two women left them for the time, allowing Naruto to be as open or closed as he wished with the girl. It would also allow him to have more trust in her at a later date, seeing as no one forced him into telling her his deepest secret.

"Ano...Naruto...W-what is it?" She poked her fingers together shyly, as was a habit of hers. With a blush she realized that this was something she didn't know about her love, something that simply would not do if she ever wanted to keep him hers and away from that bitchy cow Ino.

Naruto sighed in remorse. He always dreaded the day he would have to tell people that didn't know about his... 'Condition'. He had no idea how this girl he knew so little about would react. Come to think of it, he had no idea why she had even left with him in the first place. The two had never been close, only sharing a classroom for a few years in the academy. Sure, he had gotten revenge for her during the chunin exams and set her cousin on a better path, as well as swear to help her out, but that didn't mean she'd completely give up her old life just to help him out...did it? Perhaps her family life wasn't too great. He didn't really know, never taking enough time to find out. But, judging by Neji, it probably wasn't the best. On top of that the council of Konoha had proven to be bastards. But still...he felt like it was nowhere near enough of a reason for her to give it all up, practically without so much as thinking about it twice.

"Alright, I'll tell you. But afterwards I want to ask you a question, okay?"

She nodded, to which he smiled, before beginning.

"Okay it's like this. Do you know when my birthday is?"

"Sure! October the tenth."

"Eh? How did you know that?!"

"Ano...I uh...d-did some research on y-you before we left...?"

Satisfied with her answer, even though it was a lie, he continued.

"And do you know how old I am?"

Once again she responded correctly.

"Now what happened on October the tenth, all those years ago?"

'That'd be...the Kyuu-kyuubi attack on Konoha. So? What's yo-" Her pale, creamy white eyes flung open in realization. She took a step back before steadying herself, dazed.

After Gaara's attack on Konoha she knew that demons could be placed inside human hosts making them Jinchuuriki. She was a smart girl, and added two and two together. Coupling her knowledge of Gaara with the chakra she had occasionally felt from Naruto, that frightening feeling that reminded her of when she was a little girl, the Kyuubi attack. To top it she had heard countless whispers of 'demon' and 'fox brat' whispered at her idol while stalking him through the streets during the days.

Only one plausible conclusion came to mind: Naruto was the Kyuubi's jailer.

Hinata smiled at her blond friend acceptingly. Walking towards him she wrapped herself around him in a hug, something she had never been able to do before. But now, with this gift of trust, she felt as though she was at least acceptable in his beautiful cerulean eyes. She would do everything she could to bring herself higher and higher on his list of people, filling the gap that Sakura had recently left.

Naruto, on the other hand, was shocked. A girl his age had accepted that he was practically the spawn of a demon and probably still wanted to abandon everything in her life for him? It stood beyond the cusp of reason, yet, here it was before him.

For one of the very few moments in his life he felt loved, accepted and a hint of joy. Wrapping his arms around her in return he realized that he needed to say no words as they would accomplish nothing, simply holding her would be enough to show his thanks.

* * *

Tsunade and Shizune had re-entered the forest, leaving the seemingly dead clearing behind. Before them they could sense the forest, through use of their chakra, teeming with animal, bird and plant life. As it was to all ninja, it was an amazing feeling to sense so much life and happiness in a world where their jobs were to kill and destroy.

Konoha had always been considered a happy place for many reasons; one of them being how close it was to forests and animal life such as this. In comparison to other villages, Suna was surrounded by a desolate desert; Ame was over industrialized, keeping animals too disturbed at the pollution to live there; Iwa was surrounded by rocks with very little water and the rock rain was far too dangerous for smaller animals meaning very few lived there either; Kiri was made up of islands so only birds and imported animals could live there, although not many were imported as the ecosystem there was easily thrown off balance; Kumo was fairly similar to Konoha with plenty of thriving animals; Kusagakure, village hidden in the grass, was far more lush and green than Konoha however, and yet the people there were fairly unhappy. The happiness of Konoha, however, would be very short lived if the new group had anything to say about it, although any plans they might have were still a very long way off.

As the girls sat down on the log they could sense Naruto's slight feeling of despair through the trees and ferns. Clearly telling people about his tenant was not something he was used too, nor was it something that made him feel at all comfortable. And who could blame the boy? After being hated his entire life over the fact that he had possibly the most powerful demon in existence within him, it was no small wonder that he kept this secret so close to his heart.

"I hope the little guy does alright. But I think I can safely say she'll accept him." Was Tsunades comment.

"Yeah. You're probably right. Anyhow, we might as well do a check over what we have to make sure we get good use out of everything, rather than let it go to waste."

Unsealing their bags they found themselves covered in different materials, weapons, appliances and scrolls, as well as a pretty hefty amount of cash to top it off.

"Alright, let's go through this systematically. Hrm. I don't think we should bother with the appliances or weapons just yet, we'll just ask the kids how much they brought. We, however, can cover the scrolls. Alright so through the elements what do we have?"

Shizune began to go through the pile, hurtling scrolls at her sensei that caught them with ease. Once the entire collection had been removed from their pile of 'stuff', they began to review.

"Alright so I'll mark each lightening scroll with a yellow mark, each water scroll with a blue, each earth with a brown, each fire with a red and each wind scroll with a black mark. White marks are for either ninja style of forbidden scrolls. Each mark on the scroll signifies the rank of the jutsu within. For example, an E-rank water scroll would get one blue mark whilst an S-rank earth scroll would receive six brown marks. Understood, sensei?"

"Indeed, Shizune, I'm not an idiot" was the reply with a smile from Tsunade. The two dug into the pile with a strangely happy fervency.

* * *

As Naruto and Hinata broke their friendly embrace, one that had lasted a minute, far longer than he had ever experienced, he smiled. He had a true friend his age for the first time in his life. To anyone else that would be depressing, but to him it was a fantastic feeling, the knowledge of no longer being alone in the world.

"Come on. Let's go see what the other two are up to. By now they've probably realize I brought way to much stuff. Heh." Naruto rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, ruffling his yellow curls.

Hinata smiled and nodded, slightly less shy after their brief physical contact. She was elated beyond all reason although she'd never let it show. As a Hyuuga she was still somewhat proud, regardless of her horrible self-image.

Activating her byakugan she immediately found the old pair, surrounded by more life-forms than she had seen in a long time. All clearly forest animals and insects.

"Come on N-Naruto-kun. They're just over there."

Nodding, he ran towards them holding her hand.

The sudden contact caused her to stop dead in her tracks. Even the slightest bit of romance was still too much for her.

Not expecting the surprisingly strong resistance, Naruto was flung headfirst into a tree.

Even a good ninety feet away the Hokage and her assistant could feel the sickening crunch as bones shattered.

* * *

The old ex-head of root slowly made his way out of bed, moaning in pain as his old bones complained at this sudden end to their relaxing. Being old had no advantages, he thought to himself.

Hobbling over to his medicine cabinet he removed his bandages from the day before with his one remaining arm, something he was quite proud to be able to do, and replaced them with an extraneous red wig, a pirate's eye patch and covered his face with white make-up.

Stripping out of his pyjama's he moved to his dresser and took out a large floral shirt, suspenders, giant red shoes and purple underwear. After getting redressed he found himself happy to be in, what he thought was, his normal attire.

Little did he know that he was both heavily intoxicated and under a genjutsu, as well as having his metabolism and mind sped up to counter the more visible effects of being drunk.

As far as he knew, his mind was in perfect working order and he was wearing his same old bandages, ointment and traditional clothing. In truth, he was dressed like a clown.

Checking the time and finding himself late for the morning's council meeting, an age old tradition of the village's, he ran out the door and straight to the village tower, only one block away. He had been puzzled as he received looks from the villagers and other ninjas alike as he ran, but took no notice of it.

Running as fast as his old bones would allow him he ran straight into the meeting room. Thankfully, only the Yamanaka and Sarutobi clan heads were present, Asuma and Inoichi. Both wore shocked looks on their familiar faces, reminiscent to the looks he had received on the street.

The two glanced up to see a strange old man before them, dressed as a clown.

"Erm...who are you?" Asked Inoichi, puzzled that a stranger would have the balls to enter the room, ESPECIALLY dressed as though they were all idiotic children.

"What do you mean, Inoichi? I've known you your entire life! I know practically everything about you!"

Inoichi shuddered at the...man? -Before him, coming to the conclusion that he had a stalker. How else would he know about his fear of clowns?

Beginning to back away, he reached into this man's mind, scared of what terrible thinking he may find within, and began to probe.

However petrified he was of the sadistic tendencies this man had, he was truly glad to find that this man was in fact Danzo, indeed an old friend of his.

Asuma, who had been practically shocked speechless the whole time, piped up, more than a little disturbed "W-who are you?"

Inoichi, who had caught onto the Genjutsu while within his mind, quickly sent the knowledge to his old friend; he was hoping to partake in the little game that Tsunade and her gang had started before they left their old home. He had, after talking to his daughter the previous night, been thinking over his commitment to the village. It had long been a joke within the 'Shika-Ino-Cho' team that the village was far too 'troublesome' for them. But now things were much different, the people within now openly and violently acting in a way that he really did not like. He also felt as though his family was no longer safe. He had read many enemy ninja's minds in his days and one of the things he had often found was that the other villages were scared of the kyuubi expecting the 'bastards in Konoha' to have turned it into some kind of perfect ninja.

"What do you mean, who am I? It's me, Danzo! Fool. Gone mad like your father, have you?"

With realization in his eyes due to Inoichi's message, he began to play along.

"Oh yes, sorry, old man. I guess I must be going a bit crazy. Head on over to the Hokage's office, the elders are looking for you. It's fairly urgent, as this message says. They've been up there all morning. No one has even seen them yet."

"Very well then. Good day to you." A with a honk of his red nose (meant to be a scratch), he made his way out of the meeting room.

As soon as the mahogany door was shut behind the old madman the two broke into raucous laughter. It had been a hilarious sight to see. Regaining their composure, composure returned, they got back to their secretive discussion.

Half a minute later Asuma cried, as Inoichi had the night before, "The elders wanted WHAT?!"

* * *

After picking up the entirety of the objects they had brought, the two females ran over to where they assumed Naruto had hit, ending up in the exact place. They weren't thought of as genius ninja for nothing, after all.

Looking at her newfound third apprentice, Tsunade shook her head. Sometimes, he could really be an idiot.

"Ugh, Naruto, how on earth do you always manage to be so clumsy?"

Receiving no response, she checked down on the blond. She was almost embarrassed to find him unconscious and that she had been talking to herself this whole time. Shizune, to her right, burst out in laughter at her silly sensei.

Glaring at her first apprentice she noticed Hinata getting up off the ground, clearly dazed.

"Oy, Hinata-chan. What happened here? All we know is that the two of you were unconscious and Naruto probably has a concussion."

Completely ignorant, she looked up at her new sensei, before her eyes trailed towards the handsome blond. "Eh?! Naruto-kun has a concussion?!" clearly distressed, she ran over to her young love.

"Ano…I'm so sorry…as always, it's my f-fault. He grabbed my hand, which shocked me, and I pulled backwards as I fainted. I must have sent him off balance…" Her eyes began to water. How could she hurt him? He would no doubt hate her…

Tsunade, pretty sure of what the young girl was thinking, put on a half-smile and crouched down beside the Hyuuga heir. "Hinata. Listen to me now. Naruto would never hate someone as nice as you. Although a bit thick at times, he'll be able to realize it was an accident and wont even think twice about it. He'll still think you're wonderful. Now, listen closely. I'm going to quickly teach you a medical jutsu, as me and Shizune planned all along. Shizune, get the '_Medical basics: head injuries_' out, would you?"

Shizune nodded and complied, finding the textbook easily amongst the now well-sorted pile of scrolls.

Tsunade graciously took it from the raven haired girl, flicked to the right chapter, and began to explain to Hinata just how to resuscitate someone from being in a coma; one of Tsunade's specialties seeing as she induced so many.

* * *

Hinata looked up from the textbook after around ten minutes of thorough reading, happy she was capable of performing this task. It drew on some other principles she knew from her previous studies of medical jutsu, as well as following a few paths of aromatherapy, something all kunoichi were trained in.

"You ready?" Tsunade asked, the ground next to her littered with scrolls of the A-rank and above. She and Shizune had been planning on what techniques to begin teaching the kids as the old teaching method in Konoha was so horrible. Barely any ninja new more than five ninjutsu techniques, excluding clan moves.

Take Naruto for example. He had learnt a jounin ninjutsu in mere hours, no mean feat, yet to the date he had only learnt one other ninjutsu, as well as signing a summoning scroll. And the latter had been all but useless to him. Both would be changed, and fast.

Regardless, Hinata had just learnt, in theory, her first theoretical chakra-using medicinal jutsu. She felt pretty impressed with herself, as was shown by her face.

Hinata, who had been throwing the question around in her mind, nodded. For the first time in a while she was quite sure of herself. And Naruto needed her!

"Good girl. Now, come over here and show me. We'll teach Naruto next once he's awoken, then…well you'll see later. If he survives, that is." She finished evilly, no idea as to just what effect she'd have on the younger female's confidence.

"I-if he survives? Ano…You didn't tell me about th-that…" Hinata's face began to contort as she considered the new possibilities of what would happen if she made a mistake as she surely would. She always made mistakes, unless Naruto was there to believe in her. But she'd have to do it. For him.

As she made her way over to him, she began to question just why _she _had to do it.

"Um…Tsunade…why do I have to perform this procedure if it's so dangerous?"

Shizune suddenly thought up a good answer, fielding the question for her naturally brash sensei. "Hinata, we want to show you that we believe in you and know that you come through for us as you surely will." Shizune then let out a broad smile towards the pale eyed girl, followed by a giggle. "Hinata-chan, you're a bright girl. A great ninja, believe it or not. We just want to show you that you are. Now go on, I believe in you."

Hinata, feeling a lot better now that she had someone willing to trust her so readily, continued towards the cerulean eyed boy as he lay, breathing softly, before a great tree.

Going through the required hand-seals, she placed her hand on his head. She somehow managed to kill off any romantic feeling for the moment, knowing that her crush was worth far more alive than her feelings were. He was simply more important than anything else on the planet.

A green aura shot from her hands, coating his head and coaxing his mind out of its unconscious state. She felt her way through strange, unexplored pathways, new and amazing messages being sent to her brain. It was exhilarating, as well as strangely liberating to know she was in both the process of aiding her Naruto-kun, as well as having learnt a new jutsu seemingly successfully in such a short space of time.

Sensing his brain begin to whirr with consciousness, she removed her adventurous tendrils from his mind, slowly, carefully, as the book had implored.

Smiling with her task complete, she noticed both Tsunade's and Shizune's hand on her shoulders. She felt welcome alongside them which was something she desired.

With a cough, Naruto sat up, dazed as she had been only half an hour earlier.

"Whoa. What happened? I feel like I just had the best sleep of my life. It's awesome."

"Actually, Naruto, you whacked your head on a tree. Clumsy idiot."

"Hey shut up grandma! Not my fault."

"Oh really? Then whose fault is it?" Tsunade replied with a smirk.

"The bastard instructors in the academy of course. Idiots never taught me anything about balance and Kakashi never took the time to notice. Too busy reading, I suppose."

Hinata let out a breath that she hadn't known she had been holding. Regardless of the cliché that was her life, she was glad to know that Naruto didn't even consider it her fault."

"Then why didn't you tell him? Idiot."

"I tried! He told me to ask Sasuke-teme."

"Well Naruto, I guess that's just something we'll have to work on getting you up to scratch with in our training. Speaking of training, I forgot to mention: you're going to be learning medical ninjutsu, whether you like it or not."

"Sure. It'd probably be pretty useful. Regardless of how well I heal, I'd like to be able to save you idiots when you mess up."

"Oh shut up Naruto. It was Hinata that just saved you then! And guess who messed up? Not her, I can tell you that!"

"Oh really? Thanks Hinata! I owe you, big time."

The girl in question merely blushed; humble that Naruto would be gracious to her for anything, when, in truth, he owed her so much more through his constant encouragement.

"Anyway, she saved you. And, for learning a medical ninjutsu, she gets another. But to top it off, she gets to learn a jutsu. For such a simple task I think we'll give you a…B-rank water jutsu. That is your affinity, right?"

"Yes…that and e-earth style."

"Alright then. Once we reach wave I'll show you. Till then, let's get a move on."

"Hang on just one minute! How come SHE gets to learn both medical and ninjutsu and I get nothing?!"

"Because she just learnt a medical ninjutsu and you didn't."

"Well then here's an idea: TEACH ME. Bloody old women…"

"With that attitude I'm not teaching you a thing!"

Pouting, Naruto gave up. "Fine. I'm sorry. Can you _please _teach me that medical ninjutsu?"

Pettily smirking, she replied "Sure. Why not. I guess I do owe it to you, seeing as you're my apprentice and all. Ugh, maybe I shouldn't have made you so…"

Shoving chakra to her feet, she made it halfway to a branch before: "Tsunade, wait!"

"My god, _what is it now Shizune?!_" she questioned, voice impregnated with rage.

Perhaps there's a better way to travel than by running."

"Yeah, shunshin, but neither of these two know it. Ah, actually Hinata I'll be teaching you that when we get there."

Hinata nodded in agreement, happy to be learning anything at all.

"No, not that way. Summons!"

Tsunade paused, thinking it over. She knew that they were physical and that Jiraiya rode on the back of his frogs, she had just never considered it herself. One of the problems of rash thinking, she supposed.

"Hm. Good thinking Shizune. Might as well sign all the scrolls available now too, as well as gather some loyalty. Naruto, you summon whichever frog holds the scroll at the moment; Shizune, you summon Tonton, he has the pig scroll on him; Hinata you summon the turtles and I'll summon the dogs and slugs."

"Why don't I just summon a whole bunch of frogs? I've got the chakra for it."

"Because, Naruto, it's far better to have more summons than less. It opens up your options further, as well as allowing you to defeat other summons. There are, in special cases, weapons that each scroll has for certain members, such as Orochimaru's Kusanagi. According to legend each animal has some sort of weapon; it's just bloody hard finding each."

Satisfied with his leaders answer, he continued as she had asked.

To any onlookers there could now be seen huge bursts of chakra as the four members of this rebellious team summoned five summons, no simple task.

* * *

"Ugh, that's the last of them. I can't believe the pigs made me and Hinata roll around in the mud for half an hour JUST to prove our 'loyalty'."

"Better than the dogs at least. Forcing you to be the alpha male of our 'pack' and marking each of us as your 'bitch'. Ugh."

"Heh sorry about that Shizune…"

"Ah well. Don't think Hinata minds too much" she replied with a wink, causing him to realize that the Hyuuga had been following him around like a lost puppy for a long time now. Even during the mud-bath she hadn't stopped staring at him, her gaze unbreakable.

"Uh…Hinata? What's the matter with you?"

"Ah…N-nothing, Naruto-k-kun."

With a shrug, he turned around and asked his 'obaa-chan': "Now what?"

Almost pouting, she replied "Now _you _summon those bloody dogs. Four, please, and make sure that each is larger than me or Shizune. We're going to ride on their backs all the way to wave. One of the many bonuses of having a summon." She finished with a smile and clapped her hands as she remembered "Oh, Naruto. I almost forgot." Reaching into the brown scroll that now kept all the medical texts sealed within, she threw him the basic head injuries book. "Catch".

Deftly, he did before placing it in his personal possessions scroll, something that each of them had, and prepared to summon some canines.

As he flooded chakra into the outside world, he began to focus on what he did while summoning. He had seen jounin, on the odd occasion, cast jutsu without seals. It seemed to be the same for the few genjutsu he had seen, and he knew they required extreme focus of the mind. Put one and one together, and he could theorize how to do as the jounin's did back in Konoha.

So, as he finally placed both his hands on the ground before him, allowing him to summon four large dogs, the ones the met before, and he gained a further understanding of the jutsu. He was a genius; all it took was a bit of focus for him.

Smiling, he opened his now cerulean eyes and gazed at the four being he summoned into this part of the world. The four of them stood, proud as dogs are, gazing at the ex-konoha-nin. The first one he noticed was, what he considered, the leader of this small pack. Around four feet tall, with a strange orange tint to his fur, he bared his teeth in a smile of recognition, directed only at Naruto; clearly an equal. Alongside him was a pure white dog, contrasted with pitch black eyes that seemed drawn to Shizune. On the other side of the leader was yet another mutt, this time with a blue-ish tint to its muscled frame. And behind the trio was an almost angry looking dog, on his face seemed to be a look of contempt at the simple fact that he was no longer at home.

The group of four were muscled in amazing ways and emitted chakra levels close to that of a jounin. They were clearly no pushovers; the group was glad to have them.

"How's it, pup?" Was the leaders first words, followed by "The name is Scai. Not to be confused with the limitless expanse above us, although I do have a fondness for it." Sheepishly, it scratched the back of its head with its paws, something only Hinata recognized as Naruto-like.

"On my left, the white one, is Rita, but we call her 'Coal'." Rita could clearly be seen rolling her eyes, obvious disdain for this nickname. However, she stayed her composure, forever respectful.

"On my other side is Edin, my sister." Somehow, Edin managed to curtsey, regardless of the strange way it bent her seemingly rock hard frame.

"And behind me is the ever pissed off…Pedro." The dog in question looked at the group, his eyes meeting Hinata's in a way that seemed to break his anger, if only slightly. Naruto felt a twinge of jealousy, although he had no idea why.

Tsunade spoke up, a question having formed in her mind while the golden dog spoke. "Tell me. Why is it that I feel as though I know Edin's name already, as if it has been a part of me for years?"

"Yeah! I feel the same way about you Scai!" Was the alpha-male ninja's agreement.

"You ninja don't know this? Heh. Well I suppose it's not something even all summons know. More often than not, if someone's soul doesn't have an immediate repulsion to a summoning contract, a bond will form with one or more of the summons in particular that they meet. As we all met before, I suppose that that'll be where we gained them. I can also sense, and communicate with, Gamakichi, Naruto's toad partner."

His sister, Edin, spoke up by stating that "I too can feel a connection with Katsuyu and Tonton through you, Tsunade."

Nodding, her question answered as thoroughly as she could have liked, she took a small step back to show a readiness to move on.

Pedro, clearly bored and disgruntled, spoke up "So. What on earth did you summon us here for? Hopefully not just that bloody lesson, and I can clearly see and sense that you aren't in any danger. So either let us four get the hell out of here, or tell us why you 'called'."

"Pedro! That's no way to speak to an alpha male! Even you should no better" Were Coal's first words in the groups presence.

As Pedro moved into an insulting retaliation, Scai kicked him straight in the leg getting a whimper of pain in response. It was clear who was number one here.

"We called you here because we need a lift to Wave village. And we won't take no for an answer!"

Snorting at Naruto's outburst, Scai bent his legs before the blond, signifying that he should get on his back. Right next to them, Shizune hopped onto Coal; Tsunade onto Edin and Hinata onto Pedro.

The poor girl was still slightly shocked at his name.

"Let's go!" Cried Naruto, happily riding something that was nowhere near as big as a building for a nice change.

Together they began to race, hair and fur alike, blowing in the wind that whipped past so quickly.

* * *

Three ancient, seemingly wise men and women stood before the gathered villagers, the three all dressed as though they were mad. First and foremost in the trio was Danzo, dressed as though a clown. To his left, Homura, dressed in nothing but a skimpy, slutty nurse's outfit that barely came up to his inner thigh. Plain white, with a red cross right over his buttocks, it was a farce of a sight.

On Danzo's right was Koharu Utatane, the now sole female member of the leading four members of Konoha. She was dressed in Akatsuki robes with her hair displayed in a style similar to that of Itachi Uchiha. On her head was a headband with a slash through the middle; in her eyes were the now extremely popular 'Sharingan contact lenses'. The most idiotic thing about her attire was that her face was covered in bright lipstick, similar to how a cheap whore would dress. To the gathered population of Konoha below all could clearly see the obvious mockery of the Uchiha clan displayed.

Although none of this was known to the three elders.

Inoichi had made sure to quickly pass the news around the ninja force of Konoha that they were all currently subject to a genjutsu causing them to believe they were dressed normally, as well as being under the compulsion that they would be unable to change into anything other than what they were in now, regardless of what they thought they were doing. It was a brilliant display by Shizune, someone clearly understated for her genjutsu skills. They were all in agreement, that none were to mention their actual attire; even the members of root found it to be funny.

As Danzo made his way forwards, clearly planning to address the city, he cleared his throat, inwardly smiling. He would finally be able to take over the village! With Tsunade out of the picture, it would be easy to crush Jiraiya under his illegal perversion and have him removed from office permanently. It helped to have revealing pictures of the Daimyo to get what one wants.

With all eyes on him, he began his announcement.

* * *

The crowd was in an uproar, both celebratory and angry. On one side, the hated bane of Konoha, Naruto, was gone for good! On the other, their beloved Tsunade had left them, somehow pitying the demon. Almost every member of the crowd was in agreement on this, only two villagers not so sure. Teuchi Ichiraku, and his daughter, Ayame, were long time friends of the boy. He had always been their number one customer, the amount of food devoured by the seemingly small boy easily making up for the loss of business to the bigots that could not see past his inhabitant.

If only they had spoken to him about what he was planning to do. Chances are, they would leave this god forsaken town as if they had a certain place elsewhere they would gladly leave. It was no longer a place they considered home.

The ninja too were not so sure about Naruto's departure, many having been affected by his great personality almost liking the boy. Iruka for one was mortified that his little brother was gone.

Most importantly, Jiraiya, the now announced Hokage of the village was pissed off. Hiding on the rooftop of a building opposite to the strangely dressed trio, he could have screamed. Not only did he not want to become Hokage, he had lost two of his very dear friends. The fact that they hadn't even bothered to speak to him hurt him, although his love for them would surpass that in no time. If the elders were as big of bastards as Tsunade and Sarutobi had always grumbled about, he'd join Tsunade in no time flat.

But he wouldn't be alone.

Smiling in a non-lecherous way, something strangely uncommon for him, he began to devise plans to run this city into the ground, if ever they provided him reason to do so.

* * *

As the trio of not-missing-nin neared their destination, seated on majestically powerful couriers, Naruto smiled. It was good to be in a place that he considered considerably homey, a place where he knew he was respected and beloved. They had even named their country saving bridge after him.

They had been running along the immensely long bridge for around two minutes, and they were very near their desired position. It was tribute to the dogs speed. They had in fact been running for over four hours

Seeing their destination in his sight Naruto cried "We're finally here!"

Smiling at his allies, he was surprised to see Tsunade suddenly encased in Ice, followed by Shizune and Hinata joining her. Turning to face their assailant, he caught sight of a red-haired male glaring intently as he shot ice out of his palms, encasing young Naruto in an eternal prison.

* * *

Well, there's the awaited chapter 2. Hope y'all enjoyed. Remember to leave a review, rather than a favourite. Cheers! Also, please point out any mistakes as I love to improve my work.


	3. Learning from the past

Authors Notes: Once again, amazed at my chapters reception reaching over 2000 views in a day. Thank you guys so much for making my writing worth the effort.

--

His body demanded that he shivered, yet the reason he was forced to was the very reason he could not. He stood in suspended animation, his blond hair defying gravity, his face plastered in a look of bewilderment. Naruto was frozen solid, trapped coincidentally in the exact same place he had been trapped while fighting Haku. He somehow retained his conscious mind, allowing him to take in exactly what was happening around him. He immediately felt saddened as Scai and the other summons dispersed, leaving a sudden hole in his mind that seemed to shriek; an addict gone cold turkey. His eyes too were screaming, for attention, unblinking for over five minutes while the strange newcomer had temporarily left. Before Naruto knew it, his assailant had returned, bringing with him villagers that he did not recognize. Above all else, Naruto wished Tazuna or Inari were here; they would be able to get him out of this obvious mistake.

Within his mind he felt his tenant roar, pissed off that she be trapped doubly so. Within himself he felt her great power and rage swirling up, beginning to transform his very body, darkness starting to cloud his mind with

rage, anger, and above all else: hatred; hatred towards the man he could relate only to Haku.

But then he remembered his friends in this small, economically stunted, village, the people he had often smiled and laughed with during his brief stay, those that he had shared blood and sad stories with and, in all of them, those that he had risked his life for to protect. They had loved him for it, and he only was seen as their hero. The perfect opposite to their collective state of mind. While they were all trapped within misery, feeling sorry for themselves and a lack of desire to do anything at all, he had been there. He had been happy, cheerful and hopeful; all things they were not. He had worked hard, trained through long nights, even saved an innocent mother from being raped! He had given them hope, and through it they had been able to stand together, united for the good of one another. Naruto had no idea, but his actions and personality had completely altered hundreds of lives for the better.

With the memory of his old friends and allies, he managed to push back his urge to kill and destroy, to escape. For the first time in his life he had suppressed the seemingly invincible Kyuubi, over-powering it. It was an amazing, uplifting feeling to know that he had been given control of the most powerful being on the planet, regardless of how he was treated.

Forcing his eyes in to a glare, as well as emitting a substantial amount of killing intent, he stared directly into the eyes of his 'jailer'. Receiving a smirk in return, he nearly allowed the dark rage to take over, wanting to teach the bastard a lesson. But all of a sudden he noticed a small boy running towards him from behind the ice-user. Naruto's mind lit up with joy as he realized just who it was: Inari!

He could see the little boy yelling and pointing, the eyes and ears of the villagers now intently focusing on the young boy before shock hit them. The red-head looked stunned that he had made such a huge mistaken and

Naruto could immediately sense the ice around him beginning to recede. With the sudden change in his bodily state he could do nothing to stop the blissful realms of unconsciousness taking over, dragging him into the darkness of sleep.

* * *

Sakura sat in a small, grey box-like room. It was something like what you would typically see in a movie where the two ANBU ninja interrogate the suspect, sometimes playing good-ninja/bad-ninja to keep the questioned

hero or villain –or madwoman, in this case–, guessing. She had, after having her mind checked out by Ino's dad, Inoichi, been led to a small holding cell-type room. It wasn't too uncomfortable, filled with a comfy bed, a

T.V., a video player with a wide selection of movies, a fridge and so on. She wouldn't have minded her overnight stay too much, if it hadn't been for the inescapable dread she was feeling. Her life was pretty crap.

The love of her life had left her, even after she had offered to trade her entire world for him. She had told him how perfect he was through that, something she knew too well. Then when she had, for once, trusted Naruto,

he had failed her. He had then mercilessly beaten her –at least, she was convinced so– which had made it all the worse. Then, just maybe, her ex-best-friend had found out about her…mind's roommate; Inner Sakura.

She may have been caught as a sufferer of MPD, Multiple Personality Disorder.

A mentality issue was one of the worst things a ninja could suffer from, besides losing a limb. It meant she would no longer be trusted as a ninja, let alone a civilian. The 'other' personality could put any mission in

jeopardy and she'd read about such happening many times.

If the other personality was benign and/or inactive, usually a ninja would be allowed to carry on with his duties. If it was so much as occasionally active then other sufferers had been demoted to D-rank missions until they

could prove themselves as trustworthy, something no recorded ninja was able to do. And if one was highly active they were immediately removed from active ninja service. In the worst case scenario the 'roommate' was of

the violent type then they would be committed to an asylum.

Luckily, Sakura was as peaceful as they come. She would never hurt anyone but an enemy ninja, not like that '_Naruto-teme_', as she had taken to calling him.

Sighing sadly, she put her head between her hairy legs, her short pink hair falling freely to hide the tears she spilt; missing her Sasuke and her freedom.

* * *

The blond hero of many, Naruto Uzumaki, sat in a meditative position before his tenant: the mighty Kyuubi no Kitsune. The crimson light it emitted seemed to flow randomly behind its bars, reaching into unseeable

corners, Naruto's vision of them obscured by the sheer opacity of the darkness in the room.

The orange-clad boy in the room stared at his tenant, waiting to be acknowledged for being in its presence. He was pointlessly hopeful, the Kyuubi had been messing with unknown objects and things in his cage for the

unknowable time that the jinchuuriki had sat before him. To Naruto, it felt like an eternity. Giving up on his strangely elongated patience, he reverted to his old, familiar ways and flung a coal colored Kunai at the great

demon's hindquarters. As expected, he recieved a high pitched, alomst pitiable, yelp in response. To which was naturally followed by a deep growl of annoyance.

"**Kami, Naruto! Why the hell do you ALWAYS have to do that now? You could have, you know, just ASKED for me to look at you!**"

With his same old sheepish rub of his head, he realized he hadn't even tried to do that. "Eh...sorry, Kyuubi-chan. I guess I just didn't think."

"**As bloody always. Anyway, stop talking. I'm trying to get rid of all this damned ice in your body. It's...quite bad. Life threatening, almost. It's not reacting well to me at all.**

In a very giving mood, the Kyuubi continued "**And, just because I can be so helpful, I'm going to teach you something about your Kage Bunshin.**"

"Teach me something about Kage Bunshin? I know, like, everything about it! It is, after all, my trademard move!"

"**Naruto, I know your memories and you so obviously do NOT know everything about it. Obnoxious, arrogant idiot. Try and remember fighting Gaara? Notice how many angles there are?**" He

asked rhetorically, well aware due to his being able to hear Naruto's thoughts that _that _was exactly what he was noticing. **"See? That's because Kage Bunshin have their own memories. They aren't just some  
**

**bit of chakra used for whacking the enemy. They can also be used as a 'force multiplier'. Due to the huge amount of chakra that I have so easily given to you – for which you owe me for –you  
**

**have the ability to do what no other ninja can. If you simply summon a whole bunch of shadow clones you can learn far faster. With thirty clones all experimenting you could have learnt the  
**

**final stage of the Rasengan in a single day. Three hundred and it would have taken you one hundred and forty-four minutes. Imagine how much you could mock the blonde with the breasts if  
**

**you had managed ****_that._**"

Naruto's eyes widened at the possibilities...but it couldn't be true, could it? Otherwise Kakashi or Jiraiya would have told him long ago.

"**I know what you're thinking. And no, Kakashi barely taught you a thing. In retrospect I can understand that he was not so much trying to improve you as a ninja, but he was trying to  
**

**improve you as a person, and heal your hurt. However, he was still far too in to favoritism for my liking. I'm not sure why Jiraiya didn't tell you. Chances are, the old fool was too busy  
**

**'perving'.**"

"Yeah... that does sound like Jiraiya and Kakashi. Thanks for the tip, Kyuubi! I guess there are a couple good things about having you around. So...what should I do while I wait?"

"**Seriously, Naruto? Have you already forgotten? Go check out the new doors in your mind! The ones that that 'Yamanaka' girl opened, got me?**"

Realization dawned on Naruto's face as he shot up, remembering the promised improvement that he'd gain in his ninja and civilian techiniques. Placing his fingers in the necessary hand seal, he performed Kage Bunshin,

focusing on the pattern his mind made as he cast. He planned on making that a habit from now on, at least until he knew he had each of his very few jutsu able to be performed sealessly.

With ten clones of himself in tow he sprinted out of the room and into his now dry hallway of a mind. He noted to himself that he should thank Ino next time he saw her. Sadly he realized that such a time may never come.

* * *

The first, original, Naruto ran into a room and stopped dead in his tracks, awestruck at the size of the room. It was completely massive, filled with countless television sets and scrolls all playing non-stop. Dust covered

every orifice of the room to which Naruto glared at, disappointed that so much had potential knowledge been so untouched.

Making his way over to one of the t.v. sets, he began watching intently. Before him was a bowl of delicios Ramen, clearly made by Ichiraku as it was his favourite kind. He sad hands and chopsticks ripping into it without

remorse and within seconds the entire bowl had been devoured. The camera made its way up and looked at old man Teuchi making Naruto smile. He was good friends with the old man, one of the few that had been kind

to him in all his years in Konoha. He heard, suddenly, a very familiar voice thanking the old man. With warm realization, he recognized it as his own. To himself he questioned just what this room was and he ran, full

speed, to the very end of the room. At the end was a small television, grey antenna protruding from its top like antenna on an alien. On the screen was the exact same t.v. and within that, the same t.v. again. Naruto

moved his hands to rub his right eye and noticed, with his left, that there was now a hand on the t.v. His own. Smiling, he realized that this t.v. showed what he was doing at that exact moment.

As he made his way from t.v. to t.v. he began to recognize each set as showing fifteen minute segments of his life. No wonder there were so many! He sat down and began to ponder just how _this _room would allow him to

benfit greatly. The Kyuubi had told him that every single room was useful, but that didn't mean that how it was useful was obvious. Sitting down in his very new meditative state, he pondered.

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a video of himself and Sasuke fighting hand to hand in the valley of the end. Making his way to the set, he pressed the 'frame-by-frame' button, and began to focus intently on just

how Sasuke fought. He began to position himself in similar ways, and, eventually, had a few stances copied perfectly from the Uchiha prodigy.

His mind reeled as he noticed what he was doing. He was literally copying the Uchiha's movements. He had seen Sasuke fight many times, and definitely had enough recorded material now to copy many of his taijutsu

stylings! He then had images of Rock Lee, Kakashi, Tsunade, Jiraira, Orochimaru and Neji to use! He smiled, an imossibly wide smile as he realized that he had at least some access to each of their fighting styles. He

would definitely make it his goal to copy them all!

Making hundreds of shadow clones, he prepared for a whole lot of training.

* * *

The great godaime of Konohagakure lay, unconscious, in a spacious yet empty room. She lay on a single mat and pillow, arms and legs sprawled in a position that looked far to painful to be able to sleep in, yet

satisfaction was clearly shown on her face. Breathing rhythmically, she looked more peaceful in sleep than she had in a long time.

A sudden crackle of lightning burst outside, awakening her from her uncommonly peaceful slumber. Opening her light brown eyes, she frowned at the ceiling. This ceiling above her -- white plaster with a few large cracks

– was _not _her ceiling! The one she had awoken, hung over, to every morning since taking over the position of Hokage! Nor was it the Hokage mansion that she occasionally saw. No, this was a completely different ceiling.

At that could only spell one thing: trouble.

Shooting to her feet, kunai in hand, she began glancing around the room for her few allies. The room was spacious and yet completely bare, save for the windows and the door – a door covered in ice. And suddenly she

remembered. The riding the huge dogs, the laughter, the nearing of the village and finally sensing the malicious chakra that soon encased her, chilling her to the bone. Seeing her closest friends trapped in ice before being

surrounded by angry civilians. After that – her memory went blank. Putting one and one together she could but assume that she was trapped by the same ninja that had just attacked them.

Walking to the door, she tapped it twice to see how thick the ice was. Unable to stop herself, she burst out laughing at how thin her prison bars were. Wiping a tear from her eye, she prepared to take out the door, giving

her back her freedom. With a strange ease she took the door out, moving her chakra around easier than it had been in years. Reaching into herself, she felt around for her chakra, now fluid and flowing. Sitting down in a

meditative position, she noticed immediately what her problem was: she was not hung over. Something completely new to the alcoholic, she frowned.

Had the drink been holding her back that much? Had it really affected her so much that when she stopped for even a single night her skills were increased by at least 10 percent? She vowed to herself that she would, from

now on, attempt to experiment with the negative effects of drinking on her ninja ability. Saving that thought for later, she ran out the hallway and towards the nearest chakra signature, praying that it would be one of her

small 'team'.

Finding the entrance to the room that she 'thought' contained her apprentice Shizune, she found herself sadly mistaken.

Before her was an old man that she recognized from Naruto's files as 'Tazuna the bridge builder'.

Next to him was a young man who's very presence gave off feelings of calm. As he stood, the light caught on his shiny red hair. He made his way towards her, walking gracefully on his feet towards his prisoner, his shiny

teeth shining. Naturally. She moved his eyes slightly lower and found him to be slightly muscled underneath his tight fitting shirt. He was, quite frankly, quite sexy in her opinion.

"Hello there. You must be Tsunade. Who else would have the godaime's hat?" He smiled knowingly, happy that he had been able to correctly deduce who she was. "I am the one and only Kaiten Sui. As Hokage, you've undoubtedly heard of me and my many escapades around the five elemental nations?" He finished with a smirk, certain that he was a household name.

"Never heard of you. And sorry, I'd love to get to know you, but it's about time I gave you some payback for what you did to us!" Raising her hand, she made ready her technique in her head once more before sending a

punch capable of cracking his skull into fragments in his direction. Sadly, all she collided with was air as he had deftly jumped out of the way.

"Now hang on just one minute! There's been a misunderstanding!"

She replied with "Yeah, like I've never heard an enemy say that before!", before taking another, much faster swing at him.

"I'm sorry I froze you! But I thought you were an enemy! I'd like nothing more than to be an ally of yours!"

"Give it up!" she snarled, before leaping towards him, furious that he would attempt to play her as stupid.

This time she connected, but only just, sending him sprawled backwards into a wall.

"Tsunade-sama, stop that right now!" cried Shizune, who had just walked into the room.

"Good, Shizune, you're here! Help me kick this guy's ass, would you?"

Rolling her eyes, in a strange act of defiance, she replied "ugh, Tsunade, this guy's not our enemy. It was just a simple misunderstanding. He was acting in defense, and I must say, I'm impressed at his effectiveness."

"You mean to tell me that the person that brutally attacked us and knocked us unconscious, then separated us and trapped us in different, possibly inescapable rooms, is our friend? Eh, fine. You're usually right."

Smirking, Shizune nodded.

"Well then, Kaiten, was it?"

Kaiten nodded with a proud smirk, glad that she remembered his name.

"I take it you're the defender of this village? Well, in that case, I'd like to propose a deal. We recently left Konoha, for good that is, and are looking for a place to stay while we get settled in."

Tazuna stood, having watched the battle in scared silence, and replied with "As head of this village, I think I speak for us all when I say we'd be happy to let you --" before being cut off by his sole ninja.

Taking on a business like demeanour, he interrupted his employer by asking "What do we get out of it?"

"Ah, I see. Well I can promise ten percent of all mission payments once completed, as well be willing to defend your village from anyone that may attack while we are here. We will also donate one million ryo, as well as

buy your largest house. We will also, from now on, make every purchase we can in this village."

"Hm. That is...getting there. How about I come with you on missions, and you give the village two and a half million ryo?"

Smiling, her deliberations successful, Tsunade nodded. "You've got yourself a deal."

And truly, it was a good one. They got their very own home, surrounded by people that could constantly provide them with information and missions, as well as extra ninja later on. On top of that, it was a place that had

recently come under heavy interest by the public. Due to the fact that they had -somehow- managed to kill Gatou, Zabuza AND Haku, as well as bring themselves back from beyond an economic grave. All this together

caused people to pay close attention to this up and coming village, many rumors spreading that they were gathering enough shinobi to both kill Gatou and then start their own ninja village.

As if Kaiten could read her mind, he spoke up "Just, one more condition. If you ever get settled in here, and have enough ninja, you _must _construct a hidden village here. It's unlikely, but eventually perhaps your descendants will have multiplied and collected others."

"Of course! Anything that'll piss off Konoha we'll do." She stretched out her, offering that he shook.

With a smile, he complied. The deal was done. And now, they had a home and 'technically' diplomatic defense. Wave was protected from other Shinobi nations by Mist village, in exchange for ten percent of some old, lost

commodity. It had been a foolish deal on Mist's half in which they were only paid ten percent of however much money was made by anyone in Wave village. And now that none of that commodity was being produced, they

still had all of the protection with none of the loss.

The deal however, did not represent defense against anyone. This was a loophole that Gatou had happily abused, and would have to this day were it not for a small blond's actions on a bridge that was subsequently

named after him. With a bit of help from his scarecrow teacher, of course.

Tsunade's eyes widened as she wondered where on earth her Naruto was. Shunshin-ing the tiny gap to reach Kaiten, of whom had taken a few steps back. She grabbed him around his solid neck, exerting as much force as

she had while fighting Orochimaru. Naruto was _that _important to her.

"Where. Is. Naruto?" She ground through her teeth.

"Tsunade! He's our host! You can't treat him like that! And Naruto is fine!"

Smirking, Kaiten replied "Ya' hear that blondie? He's fine. Hey, you know how a blonde's brain cells die? ALONE." He then cracked up, which was quite strange seeing that she had him around the neck.

Dropping the prick onto his arse, she asked "Then where is he? I have to make sure that he – and Hinata – is alright."

"Right this way, Tsunade-sama" piped up Shizune cheerfully, leading her sensei towards the room where Hinata was looking after Naruto. Looking back on how she had treated Tsunade, she was more than a little

shocked to realize that she had treated her revered sensei with such a...rebellious attitude. She supposed it was simply due to the fact that she had recently become just that – a rebel. Leaving Konoha and taking far more

than they could ever need could be viewed in no other light. On top of that, while growing up she had never had had chance to act like a rebel and 'stick it' to adults. It came with having to be the adult while around the

ever childish Tsunade Senju. She made a mental note to correct her actions, but to still let out a bit of rebellion every now and then. Because, quite frankly, it felt good!

Sliding open the door to Naruto's room, with Tsunade in tow, she entered and quickly kneeled next to the male blond.

Hinata immediately stood and bowed before her Hokage and leader, showing that even now she knew how to act properly around superiors. She, unlike Tsunade, had awoken within an hour of being taken out and had

"E-excuse me, Mr. Kaiten-san? I'm sorry b-but I'm afraid I don't know a-anything about you."

The redhead smiled and replied by asking "does it matter?"

Blushing, she replied with a small shake of her head.

"Heh, don't worry Hinata-chan, I'll tell you. What do you know of Uzu no Kuni, or Whirlpool village?"

"Ano...I know that it used to be a fairly strong hidden village near the village hidden in the Mist, but it was wiped out by one of the other, minor villages in a sudden assault?"

"That's about the gist of what happened to us. But what I was actually looking for as an answer was that they contained the original Hyouton users, the Asano clan. Between the two villages of Mist and Whirlpool, we had the entire clan. But over on the Mist side of the border, they Asano were being massacred by the family just for having such a bloodline. In Whirlpool, nothing of the sort was happening. But, sadly, we lost most of our members in the great wars. By the time the village was crushed and our inhabitants had to scatter, there were only four of us. Haku was one, me and my twin sister were another two, and our Kage was another. I have no idea what happened to any of them, seeing as I was more interested in taking the world into my own hands at the time. I was just fourteen when I was all alone. Ah well, I've never minded."

"S-so, where did you go? How did you learn your ninja techniques?"

"In the academy, of course! I was always the best. Even now, I'm the number one village-less ninja!"

"Eh...w-what about Tsu-" He cut her off, too filled with pride and arrogance to listen

"I spent quite a while searching around for the people that killed my friends and family. Some were dead, but I got rid of quite a few. I'm wanted in a couple countries you know." He finished smirking, happy to show off to anyone he could. "After that, people began searching for me. Many people were after our clan. So, I changed my name to what it is now."

Hinata unconsciously rolled her eyes at the memory, remembering just how arrogant the Asano had been. Regardless, nothing mattered now. At least not while Naruto was so clearly in pain, lying on his bed, constantly sweating and with his muscles being constantly broken down.

"Whats wrong with him?!" Cried Tsunade, mortified that her closest male friend be suffering so much.

"Tsunade-sama, if I may? He has a constan fever, as well as a constant chakra drain. On top of that he occassionaly makes wide, strange movements and seems to be attempting to hit something. On top of that, his muscles are being constantly stretched and contorted in ways that, quite frankly, look painful."

"And you know the latter how?"

"It's one of my small repetoire of medical jutsu. I can heal basic cuts and abrasions, remove small amounts of poison, check muscles for strains and bones for breakages. Oh, and now, thanks to you, I can pull some pack from being unconscious.

Tsunade nearly managed to smile, impressed that her student was further ahead than expected. She would be moving her onto more intermediate techniques as soon as possible.

"Tsunade-sama, we can but assume that this is the Kyuubi's doing. He's spoken of their interaction and now, it would be safe to say that the Kyuubi has drawn him close enough to ensnare him." Spoke Shizune, who had clearly spent quite a bit of time thinking while Hinata, capable enough, had looked after the boy.

"Bastard fox. Even now, when we leave Konoha, he manages to mess things up for Naruto. How ironic."

"Not so i-ironic as depressing, Hokage-s-sama,"

Smiling grimly, Tsunade joined the other two girl kneeling beside Naruto. All three winced as he suddenly contorted.

A horde of Naruto clones beamed as the original suddenly forced his way into the necessary position for one of Lee and Gai's moves. He was still the basics, but sadly that was all that he was going to be able to accomplish while simply copying off of his memory. He had realized when he had been unable to figure out one of the moves performed on him by an academy instructor that he just could not figure out without the theory to back it up. Usually, theory had no effect on Naruto, but his ability to break most ninja laws had to have its limits. The same bump had been found in all taijutsu styles, ranging from gentle fist to the Uchiha style, and everything in between. He was, undoubtedly, a far better taijutsu user now, but still nowhere near high chunin-level, where his rank was. It was closer to high genin level, seeing as it had the add-ins of all types of green-as-grass-genin level taijutsu put into it.

He had, to his credit, been able to construct a way to mix multiple of the styles together, forming one that was still highly unpredictable, but still involved quite a lot of skill and ability to at least leave a mark on someone like Zabuza or Haku.

Finally happy with how he and his clones had worked, breaking down each style and rebuilding them into a –hopefully-- working combination, he thought he was just about ready to leave. Dispersing one of his 'watcher' clones, he felt the influx of information telling him what had happened while he had been busy working in his area. There had been many clones that had only known one style, seeing as they had been part of the original forming. These were instructed to only use that style as they went up against the new 'Naruto' style, and they had been completely decimated. Naruto felt confident that he could take on Sasuke hand to hand now, which was one of his true goals.

Smiling, he made his way out and told his explorer clones to disperse, through the dispersion of another clone. Each of the interpid explorers had uncovered nothing that was immediately useful, but that was okay. He had grown up barely scraping for the most basic of information and what he had uncovered was practically a miracle in ninja terms.

He wondered why the Yamanaka were such poor taijutsu users if they had such an ability at their disposal. Entering the Kyuubi's chamber, he smiled at the ever cute-while-sleeping kitsune.

"**Fucking brat, I am not cute. And you only have that ability thanks to me. You have no idea how much you owe me, and yet you...oh forget it.**"

"And yet I want, Kyuubi-chan?"

With a sigh, a now much smaller fox sat up. "**And yet you treat me like dirt. You always demand my power, or use what I've given you with barely a thanks. And yet, somehow, I'm going soft trapped inside you!**" The Kyuubi returned to its typical, angry form and howled a depressing cry.

"I'm sorry Kyuubi...I guess I never so much as thought about it. Is there any way I can help you?"

The Kyuubi raised an eyebrow, surprised that her jailor hadn't thrown a fit over how he had been treated in his village due to her. But she was never one to pass up an offer. "**Well, at the moment, there's nothing but the promise of your being more polite and that you'll work as hard as possible to kick both that Uchiha, and Konoha's ass for me.**"

Smiling, Naruto nodded signifying that they had a deal. He would be happy to do so. "Great! Now that we've got that sorted, how do I get out of here? It's a little stuffy."

"**Time to leave? Alrighty then. Congratulations on your improvement, Naruto-kun.**"

And with that, Naruto left the realm of his mindscape, a much stronger Naruto.

Naruto stretched and yawned in his bed, before getting completely covered by three girls wrapping themselves around him tightly, embracing him.

"Naruto-kun! You're alive!" They all chorused, causing Naruto to blush at both the proximity and the attention.

"Heh, thanks for caring guys. You have no idea how good it is to be liked..." he finished sadly, remembering how badly he had been treaten.

The three girls suddenly went stoic, the words Naruto having spoken being quite awkward. Eventually Tsunade piped up and replied, audaciously by saying "Get over it Naruto. You're loved now. We left our lives to follow you. So forget the old crap and get used to us. We care and there's not a thing you can do about it."

Naruto beamed at her, widely, expressing his thanks, as well as kudos to her humor.

"Now that we're all awake, lets go kill that bastard ice user!" Cried Naruto, to which they all groaned in response.

Authors notes: I've always loved memory. And if I had a thousand television sets showing my exactly what was going on, frame by frame, I would be a much smarter tweenager. It was an idea that just happened, but I'm glad for it. As stated he wont be able to get more than the basics of the styles, but thats still a hell of a lot better than just spamming the battlefield.

Cookies to anyone that finds the secret in this chapter!

Thanks to Lukems for letting me use the 'Asano' name for Haku's clan. Just in case you don't know, it's the last name of the voice actor for her in the anime. So from now on, Haku's clan=Asano. Okay? Okay.

Review, I emplore thee.

Oh and sorry for the late post. Better late than never, right?


	4. The blessings of a Kage

The Hokage's Exodus

Chapter Four: You're, well, about as much use as a duck.

By Falling Skywards.

Authors Notes: Sorry it took so long, AGAIN, life sucks, I'll get over it, on with the show! Also, expect re-writes in the previous chapters, so if I tell you to, **you better read them.**

P.S. Due to the extravagantly long break between chapters, expect this one to suck a little.

* * *

Wave village, the small, no longer misty village, was one currently of growing beauty. With the great, amazing, mind-bogglingly large bridge crossing beautiful emerald and azure water, and the entire island surrounded by water, it was difficult to picture it anywhere less than perfect. Seagulls flew, cawing at whatever took their fancy; people swam enjoying the nice weather; shops and stalls were filled with people, beginning their days with a bit of fresh fish there, some ramen here, some rice with that, and so on. It was a much different image to what team 7 had seen months earlier: it was a much happier, lively one.

Naruto, however, did not share that liveliness.

"Nnng…" he groaned from his bed, the incessant poking from Shizune finally drawing a reaction.

"Naruto-kun!" she exclaimed, happy to know at least that he wasn't dead. He lifted a drowsy hand and swatted at her, aiming to maim. Thankfully, as he lacked most of his conscious, his hand failed to even connect. He then rolled onto his face and began to snore.

Shizune giggled. The boy was oh-so-cute when he slept like this, his little night cap doing nothing to make him seem manlier. If only Hinata could have seen him now. Sadly for her she was out training with Tsunade, going through some advanced genin kata to improve her taijutsu outside of Jyuuken. There were, of course, a few styles that could best Jyuuken, but most of those involved bloodlines that could ignore her chakra nullifying techniques. And if their new team had a single weakness they could be certain that Konoha would exploit it as soon as possible. Hell, it was a wonder they hadn't sent anyone after the four yet.

* * *

Panting hard, Hinata bowed towards the sannin, who smiled. The girl was much better than she let on. Tsunade could literally SEE where she was, by choice, not throwing her everything into what she did. And she could also see there was a small part of her that fought it; probably connected to her love of Naruto or some crap like that. Tsunade saw that part, and, being a teacher that thought nothing of being kind to her student, decided that it was time for a serious fight.

"Alright Hinata! Activate your Byakugan, it's time for a spar. Ready?"

Hinata turned hers eyes even milkier, veins popping out of her perfect skin as Hinata nodded that she was ready, albeit a little nervous.

Tsunade flew at her new, female apprentice Hinata, chakra blazing in what could be described as by an onlooker as pure, unadulterated rage. Her blond hair flew behind her as she repeatedly attempted to pounce on the poor Hyuuga, of who's pale, milky eyes were filled with desperation and fear.

The last thing she knew was that she had been told to activate her Byakugan as they were going to do some 'light' training. Apparently, the word 'light' meant something completely different to the sannin than it did to her. Quick parry to the right! Duck under the round-house kick! Although, if they had actually trained 'lightly' it would have been pointless. In real-life combat situations, of which Hinata had been in very few, the enemy was not going to go easy on you. They wanted you – dodge the boulder! – Dead, and they wouldn't stop until you were. But Tsunade was her friend, and teacher, and she didn't want to hurt her. The Jyuuken style was unsafe for practice against anyone else. So she simply – parry, parry, jump over low kick, dodge, feign a strike-back! – was content in this fight to use this spar as dodging practice.

Tsunade didn't like that.

"Alright Hinata, listen up. You're clearly far too timid and shy and 'well-meaning' to hurt anyone at all – perhaps even an enemy – and that's not something that I really want in my team. So unless you start fighting to your top potential, and that means Jyuuken," she glared "Then you are temporarily off the team in any combat situation. Understand?"

Hinata 'eep-d'. If she couldn't take part in a combat situation than how on earth was she ever going to help?! Still…she wasn't that good of a fighter, certainly no Neji…, but at least she was some use? Better than a kick in the face, and that was something she could help prevent, neh? So if that meant that she had to injure her teacher then so…no. She wouldn't go all out…that would just be too much. So she'd throw in a hit every time Tsunade came at her, and not attempt to be aggressive. Why should she?

Hinata had all but forgotten that she was up against a sannin, which was probably a good thing as it inadvertently gave her a teeny weeny bit more confidence in herself, which would, in later days, show up in all things while around Tsunade, or the rest of the group. But that's for another time.

Tsunade charged yet again, preparing to land a blow that would knock Hinata out for a few seconds. Short enough to not affect her, long enough to make her a little bit scared of her teacher. Tsunade worked with fear. Forgetting all about her defense, simply wanting to take control of this shy, afraid girl, she left herself wide open in a random charge. It would have done Naruto proud, seeing his teacher spam someone else with their body.

Hinata quickly raised her hands in defense, Jyuuken at the ready and then….

Connected with both of Tsunade's arms, completely shutting off any chakra she could use.

Tsunade's incoming flick to the side of the head was just that: a flick. With none of her quickly fired chakra to back it up, it was like being hit by an old lady. Which is exactly what happened, that's right, Hinata got hit, by a granny.

Tsunade hissed, knowing what had happened. Although, sub-consciously, she was pleased that the girl had been able to defend herself and had landed a very good blow on her, she had still wanted to smash her. And she had no idea why.

Hinata, on the other hand, was starting to get more than a little scared, although somehow still kind of enjoying the challenge. Though only a little. She could feel herself improving, slowly getting more and more familiar with having an enemy swipe at you repeatedly, someone that seemed to actually want to hurt you attempting to injure you. And it wasn't as scary as she had imagined. She had someone (read: Naruto) that she imagined she was fighting for, protecting him against the angry lady that wanted him for her own. Her eyes tightened in a glare. She had imagined doing this many times, although had never expected that Naruto was actually ever going to rely on her.

Suddenly, leaving the village felt a whole lot better.

* * *

Smiling, just a little, Hinata steeled herself against the oncoming attack from the sannin.

Naruto rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as he made his way down the unusually familiar stairs. The last thing he recalled was falling back to sleep after a history lesson the night before from that Kaiten guy. Apparently, he was an **ONLY CHILD **(In case you missed the authors notes, check them NOW- FS) from Whirlpool village which had been destroyed in the last ninja war. And he was pretty stuck up too.

After that he remembered drifting off on the floor.

And now he had no idea where he was, except that he knew Shizune, Tsunade and Hinata were there with him, and they were okay; which meant he was okay.

Naruto breathed in a familiar scent of breakfast and suddenly he knew exactly where he was.

"Tsunani-chan!" Naruto exclaimed.

"Naruto-kun!" Tsunami replied, running towards him with a sizzling frying pan in hand.

It was a painful meeting.

* * *

Shizune sat up in the guest room, skimming over scrolls, looking for something with which to train Naruto in this morning. Of course, she'd be testing how many shadow clones he could make and explain, further, the use of them to excel his training, but she wanted to do something special with him this morning. She just wasn't sure what.

'Poisons? Nah,' she thought 'he'll cover those in his medic training.'

She picked up another scroll.

'_Elemental Basics, the five different masteries_? Definitely!'

But still, that wasn't enough. He needed something he could be recognized for beyond being one of the world's greatest ninja. Tsunade was a world class medic; Orochimaru was an evil git; Kakashi had the Sharingan even though he wasn't even closely related to the Uchiha; Itachi was a genius that had become an ANBU leader very young; the Yondaime had his teleportation and was a seal expert; Jiraiya was a seal expert and summoner; Kisa- Hang on.

Both the Yondaime, Naruto's obvious father – although she had no hard facts – and Jiraiya were sealing experts. And both had close relationships to the boy.

Why not start him on sealing? He'd be perfect for it, what with imagination that out ran Rock Lee and chakra that would put the three sannin to shame; it made sense that he would learn it. Hell, it was practically a crime against the development of all things ninja if he didn't! Chances are, his ideas would revolutionise the world. Shizune was sure of that and he hadn't even begun making basic storage seals.

And suddenly she heard Naruto scream in pain from down the stairs.

* * *

Jiraiya stood, uncomfortable in his ceremonial robes, before the people of Konoha. A bald buxom Buddhist priest stood before him, chanting away about how his duties to the village would require huge amounts of sacrifice. A drop of sweat ran down the side of his face from his brow, as he rigidly stood there, glancing at the crowd. It was difficult to keep his anti-wart genjutsu activated under so much pressure. This was his first public appearance in a long time and he wanted to impress the ladies of Konoha. It had been a long time since he had spent much time here, and now that he was the figure head of the village, he'd soon be coming into close contact with every member of Konoha and its outlying villages. Especially the women.

"Jiraiya, do you accept that this will not be an easy road and that you will have to lead this village in our time of dire need?"

Jiraiya quickly hid his smirk by changing it into a grin. HA! Lead this village he would, but not for long. He'd gather a few people that would be willing to leave with him and before anyone knew it he'd be long gone; a _hopefully _ruined village left behind.

"Indeed I do. I think all who know me well will vouch for exactly how I run this village," he left his response unfinished, making it true. In fact, the people who knew him well, which were Tsunade and Naruto as everyone else was dead, knew exactly, or at least hoped, about how he would run the village: straight into the ground.

Suddenly he felt a strange creeping feeling on the back of his neck. Glancing behind him, he saw a creepy looking clown honking its nose at him. Jiraiya, having spent a little bit of time checking out the genjutsu that had actually sealed onto the man by one the leaving ninja, he knew that the man was probably just attempting to scratch his nose.

Danzo...he was a threat. Things would have to be done to take care of the obvious influence of 'root' in Konoha. Jiraiya could already see plans formulating in his mind of how to ruin that annoying war-hawk's plans before they started. Although, in truth, Danzo probably had much more fatal plans for him.

* * *

Sitting in his newly refurbished office, Jiraiya stared at the accursed amount of paperwork in front of him, pouting. Stupid bitchy Tsunade had to leave as much as possible...bitch. On top of the three days of untouched work she didn't do, there was the stuff that he had to take care of thanks to her decrees, AND the two days that there was no official Kage. He remembered that Sarutobi, a genius, had trouble keeping on top of his work. Tsunade had had an assistant...Uh. At least, if he was going to do this, he was going to have 'fun' while doing it. His type of fun.

With a lecherous grin, Jiraiya picked up the report he had set to the side after sifting through and looking for the stuff a Kage really had to be aware of and not the drivel the Council thought to pander his way to keep him busy while they tried to work out their own plots. It was about an unknown ninja who took up residence in the recently liberated country of Wave and was said to have unreal abilities; creating a frozen tundra to fight on, controlling frozen demons crafted to look like his enemies and even an odd penchant for trying to sweet talk kunoichi for so long they eventually beat a hasty retreat, never turning their backs on him.

If he weren't such a proud man, he would be forced to go and shake the unknown ninja's hand.

Instead, he devised a plan so cunning, so dastardly brilliant and so incredible he was sure only the mind of a world class author could come up with it. Too bad he was more a perverted lecher.

"ANBU!" He hollered, getting an instant response as two hidden ANBU entered from the shadows. "It's time for Operation Kunoichi Gone Wild Five!"

The ANBU on the right immediately turned and left to gather the kunoichi needed for the operation, having heard the new Hokage talk about it for years and already knowing the man's list by heart and rote while the ANBU on the left cocked his head to the side.

"Hokage-sama? What about Kunoichi Gone Wild One through Four?" He asked, honestly curious. It didn't seem like his revered author to just start at a random number.

Jiraiya had the grace to flush while he grinned even wider. "That's why I'm not allowed in Iwa or Taki without a constant guard."

* * *

Kurenai Yuuhi had been summoned to the Hokage's office before, but never had the escort that was provided ever seemed to smile so much! By the time the ANBU who led her to the office knocked on the door to announce her, he was practically bouncing on his heels. That certainly wasn't the way a Konoha ANBU was meant to act! Especially not with the crisis the village was in!

She entered and saw Jiraiya, their new Hokage of all things, hastily moving about and setting up a series of cameras and lights in front of a white backdrop for maximum lighting exposure and had to calm her flight reflexes. "You wished to see me, Hokage-sama?"

Jiraiya quickly stood up straight and tried to hide a large light that was half as tall as he was behind his body and adopt an expression of 'oops, caught!' that didn't help calm her fears. Remembering he was Hokage and, thus, every single one of the ninja, 'and kunoichi!' he amended gleefully, he nodded and adopted a serious expression. "Yes, Kurenai-san. I do. Please, have a seat; have a cookie, sake?"

The Hokage slowly pulled the alcohol away as the Genjutsu Mistress of Konoha glared at him with sufficient killer intent to make him sweat. "Yes, well. I have received reports of an unknown man with suspected ninja-like capabilities who has taken up refuge in Wave," he said, sliding the folder to the red-eyed beauty and wishing she had taken the sake. It would have been so much easier to convince her of this. "He is apparently able to use Hyoton-like abilities, take on large groups of ninja single-handedly and come out unscathed and, when he fights, there's an icy howl that is supposed to be heard before he attacks to kill."

Kurenai frowned at the folder's paperwork and narrowed her eyes at Jiraiya. "It also appears he is a bit of a womanizer. I suppose you need a kunoichi's ... experience?" She asked with only a hint of disdain. It was well known kunoichi were oft times used for the ease in which they could get close to their male targets. They were so easily swayed by their lower members that it was almost too easy, unless you got a hold of one who expected to get directly to the action. She had been lucky enough to not get any such mission, but it appeared her luck ran out.

"Well, not quite. He's not really interested in the girls themselves, so much as the chase," he said, pointing to a section he had hastily added in the margin of the paper on she was looking at that had obviously been a plant. It was only her knowledge that he was her superior that kept her from killing the pervert.

"I don't understand, Hokage-sama," she asked, honestly confused. She had expected this to turn into some perverted conversation. All of the kunoichi, Chuunin and up, had been wagering to see when he would start calling them together to pose for his smut. Ninety percent of them lost out the first day.

Grinning like a loon, Jiraiya pointed at the photo screen he had just set up. "We need to take pictures of you and compare them to the other kunoichi to see who can appear the most alluring." He thought he was doing a good job maintaining a straight face, but it was nearly split in two.

Face set in muted horror, Kurenai looked to the elaborate set-up and then back to Jiraiya as he giggled madly, holding up a bikini that would not have been out of place on a child's doll. "Oh shit," she mumbled without even realizing it.

* * *

Jiraiya couldn't help himself. He giggled like a little girl on a sugar rush as multiple cameras captured Kurenai's voluptuous form posing this way and that. While he would be the first to admit that his mind could think up hundreds of different scenarios for the nude bodies he spied upon at the bath houses, the women never really did anything, though they did like to talk about their exploits just as candidly amongst themselves as men did. They just weren't quite as obvious or public about it. But all of that time was usually to encode his thoughts and what his spies, usually women, told him while under the guise of bathing.

They just got paid a lot more for the constant threat of being in his dirty novels as they couldn't exactly bathe with a towel on. It was another reason he chose women.

Still, he was the Hokage now! These kunoichi, whose bodies were the envy of the female realm, took orders from him! So, he naturally used that to get long-term pictures of the goddesses of Konoha to peruse at his leisure.

It was a shame the woman advised him, in the most clear method possible, that she had no need to remove all of her clothing, but he felt it a small compromise for keeping his danglies intact. It only took three threats, too!

As he finished the seventh roll of film, he sighed and realized he couldn't allow himself to become overwhelmed with her jiggling glory. Jiraiya finally motioned for Kurenai to get dressed and swore to himself the woman shunshin'd into her clothing.

"You were absolutely brilliant, Kurenai-san! You know," he grinned lecherously, "you could make a killing if you ever wanted to go into the professional movie mark-"

CRACK!

Kurenai panted heavily as she came to her senses and realized she just landed a hay-maker on her leader's face and landed him implanted into the wall.

"Okay," Jiraiya's voice slurred, muffled by the plaster. "Guards, send in Yugao, please."

* * *

The swordsmistress set the folder the Hokage had given her back on his desk and asked the one question that was obviously at the fore of her mind. "What do you want my help with, Hokage-sama?"

The twinkle in Jiraiya's eye returned as a slow and creepy grin spread across his face as he shamelessly pointed at the same series of cameras and lights Kurenai had been ordered into posing in front of not but twenty minutes ago. He was seriously considering making a calendar. "I need," he paused a moment to let a small, excited giggle escape, "you to show yourself as alluringly as possible so that I can photograph it and see which kunoichi will be best-suited for an infiltration mission."

"What," she hissed out through clenched teeth and gripped the hilt of her sword tightly. "If this is some perverted excuse to take pictures of me...," she trailed off threateningly.

Jiraiya was sure he felt her killer intent grip his throat and squeeze. "I really am sending out a kunoichi for infiltration," he whimpered. "This is purely for research!"

Wrong thing to say.

Jiraiya squawked as a sword was driven through his pants, between his danglies and his leg, and then through the chair to the point of the hilt keeping it from going any further as an angry kunoichi crowded into his personal space.

"N-n-now Yugao, you can't hurt your leader," Jiraiya said with a nearly straight face. He nearly sighed in relief as she pulled back slightly and finally nodded in acceptance.

"This is on the level, then?" She asked. "This isn't one of your perverted larks to see me naked?"

Jiraiya shook his head rapidly like a kid who denied getting caught putting a frog in a little girl's bed. "It is."

Yugao let out a sigh and nodded in anguish. Somehow, she knew there was another motive for this. Grimacing, but deciding to treat this like a bandage and just to get it over with, she took her clothes off quickly, stepping out of everything but her bandages and panties.

Jiraiya had to make a concerted effort to keep himself from leaving his pants through the hole just recently created as the woman cut away the bandages with a blindingly fast swipe of her sword and two great beasts fell and swung freely in the air. He had always known kunoichi had to bind their chests with wrappings while they worked because nothing could support them as they needed, he also knew it was painful and they rarely did it any tighter than needed. This swordsmistress apparently had no qualms against it! He would have bet, normally with a frightening precision, that she had a high B-cup a moment ago, but now! Now this beauty had just gained two levels to a C-cup!

Unbidden, a tear leaked out from the sheer beauty of such a magnificent transformation.

His initial instinct was to walk over and show her the many techniques he had learned to make her enjoy the experience, but it was the stranglehold she obviously still had on that sword that kept him well out of reach.

"Take your pictures, Hokage-sama, so that I can forget this humiliating experience ever happened," Yugao bit out through clenched teeth. She knew this was something that may be asked of her one day, but she honestly had not expected it to be any time soon, or in front of the most infamous pervert in Konoha. The truth of the matter was, these kinds of pictures were actually in all Kunoichi dossier files once they were to the point of being eligible for such missions. They just weren't created for looking alluring, just nude photos and measurements for when needed and very bland.

As the first flash of light erupted, she silently made a vow to get him back for this. She was sure there was some other reason for this. Just to be sure, she made sure her sword glinted brightly with every single picture snapped.

* * *

Hana Inuzuka, thanks to her clan's incredible senses, could hear two of her best female friends in the distance, yelling about one thing or another, though the word 'pervert' could be heard clear as a bell, usually just before or just after a long series of curse words that even she had yet to use. But it put her on the defensive.

"Did you need me, Hokage-sama?" She asked with a cool tone, not even bothering to sit as Jiraiya giggled and loaded film into a camera. Oh hell no! Her hackles rose and she was ready to castrate the man. He even had the audacity to put a hole in his pants! Just what the hell did he think he was going to get away with!

Jiraiya, oblivious to the building rage in the woman behind him as her experienced eye took in the heavy amount of chakra in the atmosphere, cameras, hole right in front of his crotch (and wondering why he thought he would need one in the back as well,) and tying it all into the man's perverted nature, giggled like a school girl on a sugar rush. So far, things had been far less dangerous than his peeping!

Hana growled in the back of her throat as she realized she was getting ignored and cleared her throat, finally gaining the man's attention and causing him to look up at her and blink owlishly. There was another woman in the room!

"Ah, Inuzuka Hana! Great to see you!" The perverted Sannin said magnanimously. "Take a seat. I've got a folder I'd like you to read regarding an infiltration mission." Hana warily grabbed the folder and began to read, keeping the pervert in her sights.

Minutes later, Jiraiya was showing her to the grouping of cameras, talking about infiltration missions, a need of the most beautiful kunoichi Konoha could use (which she really appreciated,) and her clan's closeness to their canines and how he could only hope that she could pretend to be in heat as well as their doggy companions.

"Wait, what?" She asked as his last words trailed through her mind. Surely he wouldn't say something like that!

"Er...," he said, looking like a man who was just caught peeping on Tsunade, by Tsunade. "Well, really, you guys have that doggy inclination and, well, it's all about putting on a show and- URK!"

The two ANBU stationed outside the door heard a high-pitched, girlish scream through the door to the Hokage's office and looked at each other and winced. They knew that sound. It had been happening pretty often, as of late. Just before they were to open the door, it was thrown open and Jiraiya ran through holding the tatters of his clothes that appeared to have been savaged and ripped from his body with several claw marks bleeding lightly around his body, oddly centered around his waist.

They blinked in muted shock as a swirling mass of feminine fury came from the door and crashed into him, the Inuzuka's techniques giving the seriously pissed off woman a near feral appearance as she dragged their Hokage back into his office, clawing at the floor furiously as he attempted to escape her clutches.

They peeked in to watch as Hana, a very pretty and nearly naked Hana, thrashed their Hokage while getting her picture taken and listened to the man's screams as he continued to try and claw his way to an escape.

"Should we help him?" The ANBU to the left asked nervously. That was a lot of vicious woman.

"Hell no," the ANBU to the right said forcefully. "If he didn't want this, then he would call us in. He's always getting hurt at the bath houses, after all. So he is probably enjoying it."

The ANBU to the left winced as the handle of the kunoichi's kunai seemed to find the man's rectum, all the while, the Inuzuka heiress maintained perfect poise and grace to make the pictures come out looking absolutely gorgeous. "I can't say that I respect that, but I envy his drive to dedication."

As Jiraiya's pained and terrified screams filled their ears, followed by what would be heart-wrenching sobs if they knew he didn't enjoy it, the ANBU on the right nodded and saluted his leader. "The man is an inspiration to us all."

* * *

Anko nearly broke her cold exterior and asked her broken and jittery Hokage if he was alright, but continued to read and finish the folder given to him.. He sat before her in his seat, his clothes held together with masses of tape and covered in cuts, scratches, bruises, bandages and both eyes blackened with his nose stuffed to the brim with tissues. He looked absolutely horrible!

And why in the world was he sitting on a pile of pillows?

"Alright. So you want me to find this Kaiten guy, get close and kill him or what?" She asked, thrilled to finally get out of the village! Those idiots in the council distrusted her because of her previous status as Orochimaru's apprentice and never allowed her anything but suicide missions and things that were boring as all hell. Thank KAMI that the Sandaime Hokage had trusted in her to control the Second Stage of the Chuunin Exams! That had been a high point on her rather boring mission life.

Normally, Jiraiya was a master with words. He could think of dozens of ways to say something to make you take it in almost the same number of ways so you got from it what he wanted you to get. However, after having been beaten mercilessly and doped up on pain killers so he would be capable of sitting, he failed to think his response through and simply said what he wanted without any flashy or carefully planned words.

"I want you to strip naked so that I can photograph you decide who I'm going to send to this Kaiten guy since he is so interested in chasing women and so I have them to look at whenever I want for inspiration," he slurred with hooded eyes. However, he come instantly awake as a blast of killer intent flooded his senses and his self preservation instincts kicked in, only to see the purple-haired kunoichi crouching on his desk and glaring into his terrified eyes with two dangerous-looking snakes waving from the arms to her trenchcoat and, inadvertently as she was so used to doing so anyway, giving the super pervert a direct look into her ample cleavage.

"You want to what?" She hissed, sounding suspiciously like the snakes that flicked their tongues, smelling his fear.

Jiraiya wanted to look her in the eyes and tell her he had misspoken. He wanted to get out of this safely. However, he was a super pervert, first and foremost, who was used to getting beaten in exchange for some of the smaller benefits of peeking. His traitorous hands had found their way up to her ample cleavage, somehow not being noticed by the pissed kunoichi, or her two slithering pets and squeezed twice, following suit with something no man who was in his right mind would ever do if sane, sober and not looking to commit suicide.

"Honk, honk!"

The two ANBU standing guard let out what was quickly becoming a standard girlish squeal as Jiraiya broke through his door, not even bothering to open it this time, screaming like a banshee and immediately followed by a snake that was as big around as he was tall and ten times longer, slithering like a scaled bolt of lightning and following the man, its poisonous fangs nipping at the Hokage's bandaged bum.

Silently they looked at each other, then back through the door where they saw Anko Mitarashi Anko quivering in rage as more, smaller snakes fell from her sleeves in droves and followed their larger brethren. Looking back at one another, they simply stood back on either side of what was left of the door and stood at attention, silently agreeing to never bring up what they just saw.

* * *

Looking the photos of the various girls, ranging from Anko to Hana, Jiraiya sighed happily. The young females had been such a treat for him, especially with such a difficult task ahead of him. It made it worth it already; like some kind of welcoming gift to himself.

Damn...Kurenai looked good...

Ooh...Look at how Anko was...

Were those Yuugao's legs?

Jiraiya whistled. Konoha was pretty set in the female department. If only he had never left he might know these women so much better...

Leaving Konoha had really been a bad idea. He had missed out on so much, failed so many people. Many of friends would probably be alive if he hadn't gone on that crazy chase after Orochimaru. He could have stopped so many unnecessary deaths, he could have brought back Tsunade, Naruto could have had a proper upbringing!

The poor boy was his godson and yet he had completely ignored him. It was time to be serious. He'd get through sending these girls off, and then find out where his 'family' had gotten off to. He couldn't very well leave the village without knowing where on earth he was heading to.

Quickly scanning through the photos, he had his mind made up. Kurenai would be the gal for the job. Her red eyes made her by far the most alluring, and her curves made her simply divine.

"Alright, Mr. ANBU, go get Kurenai. She's the lady for the job."

"Right away, Hokage-sama!" Said the ANBU, more than happy to go and see one of those sexy girls again.

Jiraiya smiled as he could see the man practically jumping for joy as he ran out of the room.

* * *

"Alright Naruto, let's get down to training. We'll start off with a spar, because I want to see just how incorrect the reports on you have been."

Naruto looked back at Shizune confused.

"What do you mean incorrect reports? I know back in the academy they tried to screw me over, I figured that one out a while ago. But Kakashi should have changed that, right?"

"Well, in all honesty, neither the third, fourth or fifth Hokage has ever received a written report from the man. As far as we know, he didn't even provide verbal reports, although being friends with the fourth and respectful of the third meant that that probably was a regular occurrence, with the respective kage's filing them in their own names. This results in with us not knowing your actual skill levels. Nor does anyone in Konoha know Sasuke's or Sakura's; this means the prior, Sasuke, has his strengths probably exaggerated quite far due to rumors and such by his fangirls and fanboys."

Naruto simply blinked in response, unable to handle so much information at once. Thinking for a moment, Naruto finally registered everything she had said.

"So...if I understand you correctly...no one has any idea how strong I am? No wonder Iruka was so upset about me taking part in the Chunin Exams!"

She paused for a moment, suddenly deciding to get Naruto started on reading, right away. It was a good thing she had thought to bring some of the scrolls and textbooks from the academy. Naruto would need those.

"Yes, Naruto that was probably it. Anyway, make a few clones that can go study with one of my shadow clones and we'll get started."

Complying, Naruto summoned about four hundred clones and sent them on their merry way to begin a new chapter in Naruto's life: one of learning.

His learning was quickly interrupted by Shizune's head, which just so happened to connect to the side of his head.

* * *

"Good Hinata! You're improving! But I still feel like you could do more. In fact, I KNOW you're holding back. Remember my promise? It still stands."

Hinata's face soured. She had been trying so hard! And someone as shy as her could only be pushed to go out of her comfort zone to such a level! It wasn't fair. If she went any further she risked actually hurting the sannin, or embarrassing herself when her very best wasn't good enough.

What she failed to realize, that not doing her best was what Tsunade found not good enough, NOT that she had any level of skill, be it good or bad. And to be honest, she was actually pretty good. Quite close to Tsunade's level of skill in fact, if you're not including her super strength technique that she relied on so much.

Tsunade knew she couldn't use it in battle, especially not against one as frail as a. She could shatter the poor girl's entire frame with a single punch! That just could not happen. Chances are, Naruto would never forgive her for that.

And all in all, it was a good thing that Hinata was nearly as good as her. It meant she could put up a good fight, as well as showing Tsunade that she wasn't a good as she used to be. And that wasn't even taking her slightly older body into account. Begrudgingly, Tsunade accepted that information knowing that it would be far wiser for her to go on a path of improving herself, rather than spend a while moping about being nowhere near as strong as she liked and end up getting killed. That's what happened to Uchiha's, not Senju's!

"But this is my best skill level!" Cried Hinata, desperately wanting to be able to help Naruto and the others when, and not if, they were attacked by the countless forces now out for their blood, ranging from Konoha to Orochimaru. It was lucky that the girl had no idea about Akatsuki or she would be far more afraid than she already was.

"Fine then. I guess I'll just have to force your hand. Take a breather while I go and get something."

Hinata's eyes followed after Tsunade as she stormed off, more than a little worried as to what exactly the plans of her kage and leader were. Knowing the old ladies violent tendencies, she could guess that they would be very bad for her.

* * *

"Hey, Naruto!"

Tsunade cringed as over a hundred heads turned to look at her, before they cried a deafening "What do you want, obaa-chan?"

Bloody clones.

"Where's the real one of you?" She replied with a malicious glint in her eye, warning the other clones that they should, at all costs, protect the real Naruto.

"Uh..." was their combined response before one cried "Sleeping!"

This would have saved the real Naruto if it weren't for another clone shouting "Eating!", while another shouted "Fishing!"

All in all about a hundred different answers were given until Shizune, shaking her head in disappointment, came up to her sensei and pointed her towards the ongoing spar between the two. Even from a distance Tsunade could see the two were going easy on each other.

She smiled at her loving little 'family', before Shunshin-ing right next to Naruto, getting him in a head lock and quickly explaining to Shizune that 'he deserved it, bye', before shunshin-ing back to Hinata.

She quickly made a mud clone, switched places with it, and grabbed Hinata's attention. The young kunoichi gasped when she saw Naruto, painfully held around the neck in Tsunade's arms.

"What the hell are you doing Tsunade? Let me go!" He flailed, attempting to break her hold.

Quickly raising its hand, the bunshin smacked Naruto upside the head. He stopped struggling, to say the least.

"Now, Hinata, for every hit I see you deliberately not take against me, my arm get's tighter around Naruto's neck. Naturally, with my super strength, it'll begin to hurt him. So unless you show me your full, utmost potential, your 'Naruto-kun' may be suffering a lot of pain very soon.

It was all Hinata could do not to go and try to kill Tsunade. NO ONE touched her Naruto! Tapping into her chakra pools, she pounced straight at the sannin, hands extended like claws.

Tsunade smiled, and prepared for the fight.

* * *

Ker-done.

I wanna give a HUGE, WHOPPING, AMAZING thanks to Paladeus, who not only helped me write this chapter, but gave me the inspiration to get from the 500 words that had been glaring at me from my desktop for the past two months into the now 6800. You guys should really go check out his works. Well written, as well as quite a few cool new ideas. Both Harry Potter AND Naruto.

Oh! And to those who read that thing about Naruto's relative last chapter, forget it. It was a little too good for Naruto and I regret putting it in. The two are NO LONGER RELATED. That means Naruto does NOT have that bloodline. And to all the new readers, I'm talking about something that you shall never know, as it will never again creep back into this story. Okay intarwebs? Cool.


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